Soft Poached Eggs

 Unpopular Opinion: Soft-poached eggs are the worst. 

I love poached eggs. When I make them myself, normally using those old 70's egg rings, like I've been poaching them for the last nearly 50 years, I tend to make them so the yolk is a bit firmer, not too runny. For me the perfect poached egg is semi-firm. Just a touch of ooze from the yolk in the middle. 

As cafe culture has overtaken the landscape, it seems the trend that you poach the egg so just the white firms up and the yolk remains really loose. 

And I don't like it that much. 

Part of me would like to ask that cafes leave the poaching egg in the water for another minute or two. But as I also normally order a large almond, decaf latte to go with my breakfast, I'm seen as enough of a wanker. Asking for firmer poached eggs is stretching the friendship just a little bit too much. 

Case in point, today at my favourite cafe on Bambra Road, I ordered Latke and Lox. A couple of fried potato latkes (like a Jewish version of the hash brown, but better), with smoked salmon, horseradish cream and poached eggs, with a bit of dill on the side for good measure. It's wonderful. 

But the eggs were very, very runny. 

And it's not like I don't like the flavour, but I don't like the texture. 

I also don't like the fact that whenever I have soft poached eggs, invariably I end up wearing half of it down my front. Being the possessor of a shelf (read big tits), the yolk will always end up running down my front, not matter how careful I try to be. Soft poached eggs will always end up as something that looks like seagull poo running down my shirt. 

If they left them to cook for a minute longer, I'd be right. It can't be that hard!

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