Friday, March 18, 2022

Knobs and Excrescences

 Today's pseudo-medical appointment saw me at the podiatrist. 

I say pseudo-medical as this wasn't totally necessary thing to do, but an annual trip to see Danny the podiatrist is a wonderful is a good thing. She sorts out all of the knobs and excrescences on my poor old feet. Today, is was the errant toenail with the propensity for growing inward. Rather than be bothered with it, poking, prodding and dousing it with tea tree oil, I see her and she gives me tips on how to fix it. All good really. 

The funny thing is, as a reflexologist, I get the call of feet. I know that they are a map to the soul. I love how so much can come from massaging somebody's feet. 

So I had Danny look at my clodhoppers this morning. 

And yes, there's the dodgy ingrowing toenail on my right foot - easily fixed. I was given tips on managing the bugger, which in the scheme of things, is minor. 

Then there are the warts. Three of them. 

"What's this about? she asked as she prodded and poked around. 

"I don't know."

"You know warts come out when you're run down."

"I do."

"Are you taking a multi-vitamin?"

"Yes."

"Are you stressed?"

"Fucken oath."

"Ah". 

Once you have the wart virus in you, it never leaves. They come out new and then, when I tend to be stressed - and normally on my feet. That's when I come see the podiatrist and have them dealt with. And they're a bugger to get rid of. It's a gift that keeps on giving. 

We talked about treatment. Of course, the doctor can cut them out. Or use the stuff from the chemist and cover them with duct tape. Or use the white of banana skins. Or rubbing them with a piece of steak and then burying it in the garden. (Don't have a garden, but it's worked before) Or milk weed juice (again, used that as a kid and it worked - but where to get milk weed). 

A bit like this skin cancer which I'm seeing the plastic surgeon about on Wednesday. Bugger to get rid of. But manageable. And annoying. 

Like most knobs and escrescences. They are there to show you your failings. Warts and all. 

Today's Song

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