Saturday, October 21, 2023

The Long Way Back

Hi Qantas, 

I think we need to have a little talk. 

After many years with you, going out there to defend you, even when some of your practices have been next to reprehensible, I still think we should have a chat about the last 48 hours. 

I'm not going to break up with you, no chance there, but I'm really disappointed in some of your practices which you may wish to address. 

To say it's been interesting is an understatement. 

So here we go. As with all shit sandwiches, I'm going to start with the good. 

Your staff are phenomenal. Friendly, courteous and helpful, both on domestic and international legs. I can't fault them. 

After nearly having to beg for water on my Emirates flights from verging on surly cabin crew, it was a joy to have the crew regularly walking around the cabin with offerings of water, apples and Tim Tims between meal services on the overnight flight. The food wasn't bad. The girl sitting next to me was horrified by her vegan meal but was much happier with the vegetarian option offered in lieu of the other muck (She didn't know that on international flights there is always this option on international flights). Absolutely no issue with the cabin crew. Particular thanks to Randy, who kept an eye on me after arriving on the plane flustered, as I was the last one onto the Hong Kong flight. He checked in regularly to see all was fine.

The thing is, Randy should not have had to do this. 

Which is where we get to the middle of the shit sandwich. 

I booked this flight on Frequent Flyer points well over six months ago. 

I chose the option to fly from Paris Charles de Gaulle, through to Helsinki, then to Hong Kong, then straight back to Melbourne. 

Seems convoluted, but my other options were to first return to London and fly Emirates, but the thought of facing Heathrow was as appealing as taking a flight from the Gold Coast to Bali. I could have gone on South China Airlines, which didn't appeal. I'd heard good things about Finnair. They are amazing. And the two hours I spent in Helsinki airport was easy and calm. 

I was also looking forward to a few hours in Hong Kong, another place I'd happily spend a few more weeks. I'm good with Hong Kong airport. You'd think another two-hour transfer, then back to Melbourne - yes, it's a long trip, but all good. 

What I didn't like, at all, was the change that got made about a month after I booked, which gave me a 45-minute stop in Hong Kong to get on a flight to Sydney followed by a domestic hop to Melbourne. 

45 minutes to get off a long-haul flight, clear immigration and customs and get on another plane. 

Forty-five minutes!

Since when is a forty-five minute international stopover a thing? 

People asked me why I booked this way home. Did I use a travel agent? No, I didn't book it - you did this. You, in your infinite wisdom, said that it was feasible to get off a plane from Helsinki at one end of the airport, get through Hong Kong immigration, get through Hong Kong security and get on another plane in another part of the airport in 45 minutes. 

Right. 

So, in your defense, you had the Finnair crew move me up to Premium Economy for the last hour of the Helsinki-Hong Kong flight in preparation for being escorted through the airport by ground crew. 

On the ground, I was asked to run to immigration, where I was expedited through a cursory passport check. Then I was asked to run to the security check. And then I was asked to run to the gate, where I was the last person on board. 

Firstly, I don't run. I can run but not carting a seven-kilogram backpack after already being on the road for close on 30 hours. Running is not something I could do in this situation. But what if I was incapacitated - or couldn't walk fast for whatever reason? Are you expecting people to do this? Get real!

On boarding the plane a few minutes late, the crew were great, but you're still doing the walk of shame. In my case, I was in the second to last row. 

It felt like a walk of shame. It did feel humiliating, not that I had any say over this. 

Thirdly, I manage anxiety. It's under control, but the stress of having to get from one plane to another, under escort, set me right on edge. Again, thanks to Randy for keeping me calm and checking up on me regularly. This angst and duress would be lessened if I had a more reasonable transfer time. 

I made the flight. My bag made it home 36 hours later. I was warned about this by the fellow who escorted me to the Sydney flight. 

There are a number of things that could have made this a much better experience. 

Instead of just putting me on that next plane with the extra leg to Melbourne, you could have telephoned to discuss options. I know I'm just the pleb using Frequent Flyer points, but a call, an email - something to give alternatives would have been appreciated. Given the choice, I would have been happy to wait a few more hours to get a direct flight to Melbourne, where my bag could have made it on the same plane. (Speaking to the courier who dropped off my bag, something like 400 bags a day don't make their destination because of daft transfer times in Melbourne alone - think of the money you might save!)

Secondly, what would have happened if I was incapacitated - if I couldn't walk faster than a stroll? I'm fit and healthy, but what if I wasn't? You make the presumption that this middle-aged woman was capable of making this happen. Many of us are not physically able to do this. I think it's presumptuous that think everybody can do this. You must be aware of the stress you are inflicting on people. 

And yes, 36 hours on, my bag has been safely returned, but yesterday, an hour was added to my day dealing with Baggage Services - who were once again pleasant and professional, but again, could have, and should have, been unnecessary. 

And I won't complain about the migraine-inducing flickering light above me on the flight back to Melbourne (or the fact my seat back monitor was not working, despite a system reset). Thankfully engineering came, gave the recalcitrant light a tinker, then covered it over with duct tape (how Australian bush engineering of you.) The bottle of wine gifted at the end of the flight was welcomed - but unnecessary. Lights flicker and tellies, don't work. It happens.

And I'll keep my opinions of how your fleet are looking rather tired and in need of some tender loving care.

I'm mostly disappointed about the ludicrous forty-five minute transfer in Hong Kong. It was just ridiculous. 

As a frequent flyer, I have more expectations of you, as a company, especially for knowing what is reasonable and providing better communications about options. 

And I'll end this shit sandwich on a good note. 

I'm grateful for the complimentary lounge pass that allowed me to have a shower in Sydney before hopping on the flight to Melbourne. The facilities were great, the towels white and fluffy and nothing tastes better than you toasted sandwiches (but the food is better in the Darwin lounge and the Melbourne lounge has the best Bloody Mary's ever.)

And I'll reiterate that your cabin crew are fantastic. Always have been, always will be. 

But seriously, look at your international transfer times. The computer should be saying no to anything under an hour and a half transfer in major hubs. 

I'm very happy to discuss this further. 

Yours,

Pandora..

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