A Difference of Opinion

I didn't want to talk to him, although after three years or so of no contact, I was half-interested in what he wanted to say. 

There's a strict no-contact caveat on him from my end. Not that he doesn't contact me - but I don't make any contact with him. He's not blocked, but his number is no longer in my phone. Years ago, when I made this choice, it was hard at first, but no-contact is like a muscle - it gets stronger the more you exercise it. Like my McDonalds ban this year. I've not gone to McDonalds this year. At all. not even for coffee - but the no longer do decaf, so no reason for me to go. I will keep this going, with an exception to be made if Christmas is at Blarney and Barney's place. We always go to McDonalds for coffee on Christmas morning - it's our happy little bogan tradition - that and it's one of the few places open for coffee Christmas morning. The bogans are lining up around the block in Altona. 

Regardless, not contacting him, like my McDonalds ban, makes me feel good. Less rubbish going in, the better I feel. 

He rang when I was in the gym first up. I was on the leg extension machine. 

"Fuck off," I yelled at my watch, before not accepting the call. 

"But you like leg extensions," Chuck countered.

I did a number of personal bests in the gym that night. 

He called again a minute later. 

"I'm at the gym, call later," I yelled into my Apple watch, before going back to exercising my quads.

Later we spoke. 

I kept non-committal. He said we hadn't caught up for a while (three years). His first question was "So, are you married yet?"

My response. "What the fuck would I want to do that for?"

There was more idle chit chat. For somebody who's known me for around 30 years, he asked whether both my sisters are gay. He conveniently forgot that I had a cat. He somehow forgot that my niece passed away from leukaemia ten years ago. 

The conversation turned. He lives in the north of England in a small seaside village near the Scottish border. The comment was made, "England's full of immigrants."

My response. "Shite, you're one of them."

The anti-immigration diatribe going on around here, the rise of Trump, Nigel Farage and Pauline Fucking Hypocrite Hanson gets right up my nose.

He was a somewhat shocked. 

I walked my comment back a little. I told him that I realised that the situation in Britain, and America was different to the situation in Australia, however, I come from a country of immigrants. Unless you're of First Nations blood, you're an immigrant. And if you don't like immigration, then give up on your bahn mi, curries, Chinese food, pizza, festivals and the like. I also confessed that I live in a left-wing enclave, and that I like the diversity immigration provides. 

His next question. "What's left-wing?"

This used to be a very smart person. He was accepted into Oxbridge in his youth. He ran for parliament back in the day for a left-wing party. 

Maybe he's in the first stages of neurological decline. 

Regardless, when we got off the phone, I was overwhelmingly aware of the nuclear missile sized bullet that I'd dodged, and realised that the no-contact status, on my part, has been very good for my psyche. 

A wise friend once told me, "As we age, women expand, men contract."

He's so right. 

Today's song:

Sunday Stealing Does Favourites

 I've had a very social day. First of I got to meet my friends' puppy - which was an utter delight (along with seeing my friends) Then it was out to a party, where I was overjoyed to find that there was a shed where all the neurodivergents met up, away from the noise and crowds in the main house. We sat by the fire and discussed what it is to be a late diagnosed neurodivergent. I found my people. Then their kids came and found us, it got noisy, so I drove home. 

I now know why I smoked socially - it got me away from the rabble. Who knew?

Anyway, here are this week's questions, brought by Sunday Stealing.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ...? 

1. Flavor?

Probably vanilla. If not, lemon. But vanilla is strangely complex when done well

2. Movie?

I have many favourite movies, but these three spring to mind. So, I outsourced this to AI - and this is what it came up with. 

"Yes. I found a post on Princess Pandora – Queen of Denial specifically titled “Ten films that get me”, published September 23, 2020. She describes these as films that “get me at a cellular level” and says they are films she loves and cherishes.

Pandora’s top ten films

Garden State (2004) — Zach Braff

Bull Durham (1988) — Ron Shelton

Donnie Darko (2001) — Richard Kelly

Pride (2014) — Matthew Warchus

Closer (2004) — Mike Nichols

The Boys Are Back (2009) — Scott Hicks

Henry V (1989) — Kenneth Branagh

Three Colours: Blue (1993) — Krzysztof Kieślowski

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (2017) — Martin McDonagh

The Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016) — Taika Waititi

A couple of interesting qualifications: Three Colours: Blue is described as one of her “most cherished films ever,” while Bull Durham is her go-to film when she needs cheering up. She also says she saw Branagh's Henry V eight times in the cinema.

She subsequently listed a somewhat different set of films she “never get[s] tired of watching” in September 2020, including The Princess Bride, Logan Lucky, V for Vendetta, Deadpool and Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day.

My two favourite Australian films are Rabbit Proof Fence and Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. (Muriel's Wedding is a bit to close to my own family.)

3. Piece of jewelry?

I don't wear much jewelry, and when I do it's silver - but I have a number of Pandora bracelets. I should wear them more often. But they're heavy.

4. Place to be?

Pick one of the following:

• My bed
• Paris
• In a cinema or theatre
• London
• Any cathedral or castle in Britain
• In a room filled with puppies and kittens (or any baby animal)

5. Boy's name?

Moot point as I'll never be having children, but I rather like Matthew.

6. Girl's name?

As above, but I alway said that if I had a daughter I'd call her Freya. 

7. Candy?

Do you mean lolly - small, sweet things. Australia used to have a culture where 20 cents would get you a bag of pick and mix lollies. In my bag I would have:

• A Freckle
• A jaffa 
• A caramel swirl
• A spearmint leaf or two
• A red frog
• A jelly snake
• A Freddo
• And maybe a candy banana, as that's the only way I'll eat bananas willingly. 

8. Sports team?

The Adelaide Crows. It's the Australian Rules Football team from my hometown. I don't get other football. It's Aussie Rules or nothing. 

9. Color?

Pillarbox red.

10. Month? 

I love April, even if TS Eliot says it's the cruelest month. It's not to hot or cold, the leaves are turning (remember, I'm in Australia, things are backward here) and it's no longer daylight savings. 

Today's song:

Theatre Review: Break of Day

 The Play: Break of Day by Steve Rodgers

The Space: The Merlyn Theatre at The Malthouse

Runtime: 1 hour 45 minutes

Until 29 August

Stars: 5

This evening had the potential to go awry, considering a large school group turned up just before the lights went down. I was here on spec. I saw Kat Stewart was in the play - she's always fabulous. And with Sarah Goodes directing the show, it was bound to be good.

Thankfully, the students, a group of year eleven theatre studies students from the Middle Eastern suburbs behaved beautifully. I also found out from the teacher who was sitting in front of me, that this is a part of the syllabus. 

Lucky kids. 

This is exemplary theatre. An engrossing, thought provoking, part tragic, part hopeful drama about life on the fringes. 

Pam (Kat Stewart) is a grafter. A single mum from Burra Creek, a place the NBN forget. She had dreams. She has dreams, especially for her daughter Rae (Sherry-Lee Watson), a smart kid who deserves better. Rae's aware that her mum takes three buses each way to do her 12-hour shift at the local retail warehouse where she packs goods for the rest of the country's whims. 

At work, Pam has a friend in her supervisor, Sanjeeva (Chum Ehelepola) who looks after her, sometimes taking a blind eye to her small slips. Jedediah (Theo Clarke), a local kid who's in care, and a friend of Rae, works at the warehouse as well, hoping to fund his way into college, and out of the town. 

Adding to the action, Pam's father, Rae's Pop (Richard Piper) is busy getting thrown out of his hostel and hell bent on alienating the family. As Rae tries to finish an important assignment on her failing laptop without internet, things start to fall apart. 

I will say no more about the plot. The play is testament to a mother's love, what you do for family and the ultimate choices you make when your life on the fringes at the gaps between the haves and have nots explodes. 

All of the cast put in extraordinary performances. Kat Stewart nails Pam's fight and fragility. Richard Piper's performance as Pop rivals his turn at playing King Lear a few years ago, where he was also exceptional. Sherry-Lee Watson and Theo Clarke are their perfect foil as the young, bright kids with their futures in their hands. 

Anna Cordingley's set, based on the warehouse and Pam's one-bedroom flat on the outskirts of the outskirts is wonderful, and is supported with Paul Jackson's lighting, which brings this all to life. 

Check TodayTix for seats - you can pick them up for a steal. This is definitely worth seeing. If it can keep 25 Year Elevens entranced, they're doing their job. Of the school group, the young girl next to me had to leave - it was too much for her - far too much like real life. The number of blowing noses and sniffles at the end was gratifying. 

Break of Day is bound to become an Australian classic. 

I can't recommend this play enough. 

Today's song:

Muscle Memory

 The text came through early this morning.

Mike: Do you have boxing gloves?

Me: I can get some boxing gloves. Pop into Kmart on the way home.

Mike: Excellent. See you at 7.30.

Me: I warn you. I used to train under one of Lennox Lewis's trainers.

Mike: Should I be worried?

Me: I'm pretty unfit. You'll be fine. 

I used to box. I used to love boxing. I got very fit boxing in the 90s. But other than BodyCombat and a few boxing sessions over the years, I don't think I've done any boxing in five years. 

I got a bit excited. 

After work, I made my way to Rebel Sport and got myself a cheap pair of cardio gloves, went home, fed the cats, got changed and made my way to the middle gym to see Mike the trainer for half an hour of boxing. 

Mike had a student shadowing him. Nice fellow. He introduced himself. 

"Hi, I'm Scary," I told him with a big smile on my face. 

Please remember. I do train regularly. I've strong - last night's string of personal bests last night with Chuck - Deadbugs, straight legs with a 10 kg plate anybody? 

It turns out muscle memory is a great thing. 

My body instinctively knows how to jab, punch, duck, uppercut, hook. I know how to use my knees, breathe, protect my face and keep going. 

I did my 30 minutes without complaint. It was a brilliant session. 

There is something very satisfying about the sound of a glove hitting a focus pad.

I am going to really hurt tomorrow. The magnesium drink has been drunk, a hot shower, 10 minutes longer than I usually take, is complete, and I'm going to go to bed soon.

But I'm officially in my late 50s next week. I've been going to the gym for a very long time. I've trained myself to be able to do this sort of thing without injuring myself. 

I feel intensely proud that I have had a man tell me, "You punch. You punch hard. I really wouldn't like to get on the wrong side of you."

The gym work has paid off. 

Today's song:

The To Do List

I need to have a checklist. There is so much to do, and I keep sitting here on my couch crocheting blankets. This has to stop.

Also, I find that it’s good to have a list, I have something to mark off, something that shows that I’m making some sort of progress.

Here are the things that I need to start getting done:

1) Start getting my tax in order. 

It’s that time of year. Thankfully, my tax affairs are fairly simple. But it’s a matter of getting the spreadsheet done, getting all the receipts and putting them in order, and I am waiting for one piece of paper from one of my managed funds. They said they would be out at the end of the month. What’s that happens? I can ring the accountant and get that done. 

2) Call the New York Times

My subscription to the New York Times, which I do read every day, as well as do the Wordle and their connections puzzle, went from four dollars a month to $25 a month. I need to speak to a human for this one. Hopefully they will put me on some special deal for another year at a few dollars a month and life will be okay again. I do like reading the New York Times, just to see what’s going on in the United States of Hell. At least you know everything has been fact checked.

3) Look at the mason’s books

I am the auditor for one order, and the treasurer for another. One is a 20-minute job. The other is a half hour job. I must stop procrastinating.

4) Learn my mason’s ritual for next week

Learning ritual is like learning lines for a play. I have quite apart in the ritual for the week after next. I have done this a number of times before but I have to bone up on what I need to do. It’s a nice thing to do.

5) Put a few more things on Depop

I’ve been having a cleanup around this place and it’s been good. I’ve sold a few things. There are a few more things to go on this wonderful website which helps you sell off pieces of your wardrobe. Very easy to use to, I just have to stop procrastinating.

6) Price up birthday cake

I probably should bring a birthday cake to book group next week. We’re meeting in person at my local pub. There is no cakeage, but if I’m going to bring my own birthday cake to book group, it might as well be something I enjoy. Jonella offered to make me a birthday cake, And that was very lovely of her, but I have a feeling I want something that’s either vanilla or caramel. Not chocolate. I can also get something very little, cause nobody in my book group seems to eat anything sweet after 4 pm.

7) Start looking for a new job.

It’s that time again. I have a job until the end of September, but about six weeks out I start looking again. This is not to say that where I am at the moment might have something for me after September, but I would like to get ahead of the game. I’ve started to make my list about what I’m looking for. I’m gonna get a job, and it’s gonna be great. Just watch me..

8) Start watching Ted Lasso

The new series of Ted Lasso is out. One episode a week. I love Ted Lasso.

Now let’s start marking some of these things off.

Today's song:

It's Census Night

 The form is in - did it yesterday. 

It wasn't that controversial - not at all.

I am home. 

I'm still living where I was ten years ago. 

I'm still alone.

The questions about financial status, home ownership status, child ownership status and marital status were all pretty standard - not that marital status means anything to me. Why anybody would want to get married is beyond me. 

I remember for the last census there was a lot of bluster around the non-inclusion of a question about sexuality. There was one this year - no fanfare, no hassle - pretty straight-forward really. According to AI, the question read:

The Australian Bureau of Statistics includes a sexual orientation question on the census for people aged 16 and older. 

The exact wording asks: "How does the person describe their sexual orientation?"

Key Details About the Question: Optional to Answer: It is completely voluntary, and respondents can choose not to answer.

Age Limit: It is only asked of individuals 16 years of age and older.

Purpose: The data helps plan targeted health, social programs, and community services.

Available Response Options

• Straight
• Gay or Lesbian
• Bisexual
• Use another term (with a write-in text field)
• Don't know
• Prefer not to answer

I suppose it appeases the wowsers to have this as an optional question. And if you're trans, or pan, or a-sexual, or whatever you might be, there's space to write it in. 

The other question that tickled me was the one on religion. AI says it read:

"What is your religion?" on individual digital forms.

Answering this optional question is managed through a combination of common tick-box selections and a free-text write-in field.

Tick-Box Options: Based on the most common mutually exclusive responses from the previous 2021 Census, the listed choices include:

• No religion
• Catholic
• Anglican (Church of England)
• Islam
• Hinduism
• Uniting Church
• Presbyterian
• Buddhism
• Greek Orthodox
• Baptist
• Free-Text Field: A write-in space is provided for any religion or spiritual/secular belief not explicitly listed among the standard tick boxes.

Rather than say that I'm a masonic, Kabbalistic Wiccan, I erred on the side of No Religion. I'm certainly not a Christian, there was no box for agnostics and it's easier to just say you don't participate in organised religion, than say something else. I'm a bit surprised that there wasn't a check box for Judaism - or maybe it's the circle of friends I keep. 

To be honest, I think this is a fairly important question. Hopefully the non-Conservative Christians can see that they're in the minority and they can take their religious beliefs and either keep them to themselves or stick them up their bum. (Can I say it any plainer?)

And though they've said that there's a large fine for those who don't answer truthfully, I reckon there might be a few transexual Jedis who never got out of kindergarten filling out the form.

Today's song:

Movie Review: One Night Only

Movie Number 31 of 2026

The Movie: One Night Only

The Cinema: Hoyts Victoria Gardens

Runtime: One hour 42 minutes

Opens next week. 

Stars: 4

There is a hell of a lot more to One Night Only than you initially expect. I went in thinking it was going to be a run of the mill, second-rate romantic comedy. I was very pleasantly surprised, despite the dodgy premise. Yes, it's a rom-com. It's also a very pointed social commentary if you wish to view it that way. It's also rather funny. It makes for a good film. 

If you can relax into the bizarre proposition of the film, you can enjoy it. Set in our times in New York, the country has outlawed pre-marital sex. People are tagged with these tattoos which can tell if you're married or single. However, there is one 12-hour window, once a year, where the unmarried population can do the deed without being arrested. 

We then meet Owen (Callum Turner) and Ali (Monica Barbaro). Owen has been told by his girlfriend that she wants to see somebody else on this auspicious evening. Allie, who was out to find somebody with a bit of substance with her friend, is left to her own devices. 

Of course, Owen and Allie keep running into each other over the night. There is a lot of off-colour humour, some running gags, a savvy script and in-jokes. Of course, you see it coming that Allie and Owen are made for each other - and that their attraction is not just about sex. Will Travis's script has some genuinely funny and sweet moments, which let the political subversion of the whole set up go by relatively unnoticed. Director Will Gluck has directed some of the better romantic comedies in the last few years. He brought charm to Anyone But You, and a lot of fun to Easy A. He knows what he's doing. 

What's stuck out to me was that in this period of authoritarian right-wing Christian Nationalism in America, despite the dodgy tracking, you could feasibly see something like this happening over there. What made it even more realistic is the community backlash to the mandate, and as with all political protest, the more humorous the better. This part of the film isn't rammed down your throat, but it is there, rounding out the film. 

I went in thinking it might be lame. I came out pleasantly surprised. It's a fun, easy watch even if it is a little off-colour in places. 

Today's song: