Notes from today

 It's 10 p.m. It's been a really busy day:

So far, I've:

• Walked 15,000 steps (including going on a walk with an old colleague along the river)
• Read a few chapters of my book
• Gone to the gym for a session with Chuck
• Released the COVID weights to another poor sucker for Cleo to torture her with
• Talked to an agency.
• Revamped my CV for a role that I don't think I want and they probably aren't going to want me, but, hey, that's what AI is for and you have to let the universe know you're looking. (I'm not sure I want to work in Moorabbin...)
• Talked to my shrink. 
• Talked to my shrink without melting down too badly - a couple of tears, but that's okay - expected. 
• Done some crochet.
• Did a mini food shop
• Started work on a proposal document for a job I interviewed for two weeks ago. 
• Accepted a HR call with another company for tomorrow. 
• Didn't whinge about the heat.
• Thought about cleaning the kitchen table
• Had two showers.

This being between jobs thing is busy. 

Of the blessings I'm counting:

• I am getting calls and emails about jobs. 
• I'm out of the bank I was working at - their press at the moment is awful.
• I've happily cut my Ritalin down to one a day unless I really have to focus in the afternoon - just enjoy the fizzy brain in the afternoon. 
• Some writing has been done.
• And all the exercise I'm doing is making me feel great. 
• Oh, and I got a big cuddle from the cat, who likes sitting under the airconditioner, looking like a very large cockroach when he's all splayed out. 

I told my shrink about the job hunting, and how the RSD (Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria) doesn't really come into it because, to be frank, I really don't care. I'll know the right job when it comes. It's not far away (touch wood) and I'm enjoying this stay in Windowsill Bay. It's coming

The cat showed his displeasure at my speaking with the shrink by hopping up on the table and showing her is butt. 

You gotta love them. 

Me, I've done 15,000 steps today and I think I need my bed. I've got to be up early to finish off this proposal document. It should come easily once it's percolated overnight. 

Today's song:

#amwriting

I prefer the back entrance, the one down La Trobe Street, opposite the gothic splendor of the RMIT buildings, just down from the Old Melbourne Gaol, where the ghosts of prisoners past reverberate down Russell Street. I prefer the back entrance as it's close to the loos, which are clean and little used. I prefer the back entrance as it's the easiest way to get into the Redmond Barry Reading Room, my preferred writing room, preferably upstairs in one of the corrals. 

Unfortunately, October is exam time, and the State Library is full to the brim with students gathering points and stomach ulcers for their ATARs by hitting the books. Finding an upstairs corral was impossible. Finding a seat in the downstairs area was nearly as bad, but I'd spotted a couple of perches and was able to snag one. From last week's experience, the main reading room with the impressive dome is filled with the pheromones of stressed-out students - and I don't need to be around that. The Redmond Barry Reading Room is more my jam. It reminds me of my favourite possie in the Adelaide University's Barr Smith Library, in a corral, next to a window with Samuel Pepys for company. 

The laptop fired up and plugged into the socket. The wireless mouse is turned on - spare batteries are in the pencil case with the other leads. My notebook is placed next to the laptop, the Yeti half filled with water, no longer cold, but the sign on the desk says no food or drink other than water, and the Coke Zero in my bag will have to stay there. I've always been too obedient.

I'm writing. There's 15000 words in this document. I'm second drafting. Trying to tame my words into something cohesive. I'm back with the dystopian novel. I've discovered formatting. adding, subtracting, smoothing the words, slashing paragraphs, noting ideas. 

Having the time to write is a privilege and an opportunity I can't waste. I want this for myself. 

Just as the job will come, and come soon, I need to take this time do to what I love. 

For the next week or so, however, I might have to find another library. Maybe Richmond, or Kew. Maybe go to the city library near the market (although that is dangerous for all the food) or the one near Degraves Street. Quiet writing possies are a necessity. Between cats and Fleischman is in Trouble, there are too many distractions at home. 

I'm going to get a great job and it's going to be great - but for the moment, I'm a writer of novels. 

Today's song:

Movie Review: La Bola Negra (The Black Ball)

Movie Number 40 of 2026

The Movie: La Bola Negra (The Black Ball)

The Cinema: Village Rivoli Camberwell

Language: Spanish with English subtitles

Runtime: Two hours forty minutes

Stars: 5

Mark me with this one. La Bola Negra should be up for a Best International Film Oscar nomination. 

It's incredible. IMDB.com has it ranked as an 8.2, RottenTomatoes.com a 92%. 

It's also tense, violent, queer, cerebral and dramatic. Along with this, bring in the fact that it's superbly shot, with an excellent soundscape and you've got a film you don't want to take your eyes off, even when things are getting tense. 

Also, if you're aware of the concept of the black ball, the apparatus use to vote new members into associations by a blind poll (White ball for acceptance, black ball for rejection) this adds another meaning to this, along with the associations with an unfinished play by Federico Garcia Lorca - which comes part of the film. 

I went into this blind, knowing that the cinematography looked amazing. 

I'm so glad I went. 

There are three strands to the movie which weave in together, which looks at what it is to be gay at certain points in Spanish history. You have to trust the process as you really will have no idea how the three stories are linked. 

In the first we meet Sebastian (Guitarricadelafuente) in 1937, who lives in a small town, plays the trumpet for his local town band, until the Italians bomb his village and he's conscripted into the army. At an army hospital, he's ordered to stand guard over Rafael (Miguel Bernardeau) a dissident who is only being healed so he can be interrogated. 

Secondly, we meet Carlos (Milo Quofes) in 1932 who is trying to join a casino cartel in his town. He is rejected for his homosexuality. 

Lastly, we meet Alberto (Carlos Gonzalez) who's living in 2017 and has just been contacted by the executors of his grandfather's estate. 

Oh, and Penelope Cruz and Glenn Close have cameos in this. 

I'll say no more about the plot, other than this is finely woven into a glorious, cohesive story. Written by Javier Ambrossi, Javier Calvo and Alberto Conejero, and directed by the two Javiers, this is exquisite. I won't say more. Go see this - it will be better on the big screen.

Yes, it's a long film, and yes, it's got subtitles. It doesn't matter. This film is exquisite. You will learn something about a lot of things - not only Spanish history, but it provides insights into what it was, and is, to be queer in societies which from upon it. 

Hunt this out. It's amazing. 

Today's song:

1500 Days of French

 My Duolingo streak ticked over to 1500 days today. 

1500 days - somewhere around four years and one month I've been doing my daily French lesson. I've not missed a day. I haven't even used streak protection. Every day, for around ten minutes (now that I've finished the Duolingo French course) I do a bit of practice. 

Why? I want to be bilingual. I'm not there yet, even though I can get around the language without butchering it too badly.

If I had my way, the universe would let me settle in France, where I could get my French to an even better state (and hop over to London regularly for a visit to the theatre.) Immersion is the only way to go. 

I try and read Le Petit Prince regularly. It's the only French text I have in the house. 

Thinking about it, I did five years of French at high school. I reckon I've done more French as an adult than I did in school. 

I love it. I'll keep going. I'd like to find either a regular conversation group or a course that can get my language knowledge further. Maybe I should learn to sing La Marseilles, not just the 'marchant! marchant! bit. (If you've never seen Casablanca, when they sing this, knowing most of the extras were of French origin while the Germans occupied their country - superb.)

At least I have something to aim for. Maybe for my big birthday in two years, save up and go to France for a month. 

Still, any language skills are never wasted. 

Vive la France!

Today's song:

The Twenty-Firsts

I had to turn up to this one. The one on a Sunday night after a long lunch with colleagues in the afternoon. It would have been easier to stay at home, but this 21st party was a must show. My 'godchildren', Liam and Polly, turn 21 tomorrow. 

I put the 'godchildren' in brackets because I'm not their godparent in the eyes of the Catholic Church. Some 20 years ago I wasn't selected to be a godparent because I'm a heathen. At the time, the Catholic Church frowned upon those of other faiths being made godparents fontside. I remember at the time having my nose a little out of joint for half an hour, then got over it. Bernie has been a part of my life since first-year university. When she and her husband Daz ask for help, I'm there. Over the years, I've been around these kid's lives. They've cat sat for me while I was up in Darwin.  We got to the odd film or play together. Occasionally, I go round for Sunday Roast. They're family. I was at Bernie's 21st some nearly 40 years ago - she might have even been at mine. 

My phone number was put in their first phones as a 'call this when you need an adult who isn't a parent.' Daz approved of this, stating I was a good adult to have in their phone. They were told I can talk my way out of anything - sometimes you need that.

Regardless, I turned up.

It was nice. They seemed genuinely happy to see me. Polly looked gorgeous. Liam is all excited - he starts work tomorrow after a number of years of not being able to find a job. 

Of course, 21st are not what they used to be. Mind you, we Gen X had mostly moved out of home by this age - I'd been out four years by the time I turned 21. And what do you get the yoof of today for a 21st present? You used to get glasses, pewter tankards, all sorts of tatt for the house. Most kids are still living at home now, moving out a pipe dream unless you're having to move interstate for work. 

Being their 'god mum', they both received a card from me with a voucher to be taken to some sort of performance. To be discussed when I'm back in work and uni exams are over. They're both quite arty, Liam is into film, and Polly likes plays. 

There were also many people I hadn't seen for ages. Bernie's sister for one who lives in country South Australia. Juan, the twins actual godfather (being part Spanish, he's a proper Catholic) another. Juan and I normally find ourselves at family parties drinking under the clothesline. Juan's a renown botanical artist. 

"Pand, when is that book coming out?"

Yes, Juan. 

"Lunch soon."

"Yes, Juan."

Daz said the same thing. 

It was a lovely night. Thankfully, the function room was well ventilated and not too noisy. I stayed for a while, for the speeches and cutting of the cakes. They're twins. They get two. As it should be.

On the way out, Polly introduced me to her boyfriend, an earnest yoof, clean cut, well-mannered. They are well-suited.

"And this is my godmother, in every way that matters," was how Polly introduced me. 

It takes a village. It's a village of which I'm thrilled to be a part. 

Today's song:

Sunday Stealing Breaks a Promise

 I've been out all day, and it has been wonderful. Meditation, followed by a wonderful tea blending class, then an impromptu dinner with EJ. It's been a lovely day, but it means I'm getting this off late in the day. 

Questions, as always, come from Sunday Stealing. 

1) Describe yourself in three words.

Kind, adventurous, intelligent. (I'm not blasting my own trumpet on the last one - I'm reasonably smart).

2) What's your favorite dish at your favorite restaurant? 

EJ and I went there tonight. I love this mum and dad Vietnamese restaurant near my place. They do this dry shredded beef in spicy sauce. I take everybody there for this dish. It's incredible. The place itself is a real what we call Mum and Dad restaurant, complete with a box of tissues for serviettes, formica tables, and in the early days, the kids, who now wait on the tables, used to be up the back doing their homework. 

3) Did you set goals for 2026? If yes, how are you proceeding toward them?

I'm getting somewhere with them. So far: 

• I've left the country for a few days
• Read at least a book a week
• Seen lots of theatre and films
• Kept fit
• And started the deep clean of the flat. 

All of this is something. 

4) What's something you have learned the hard way?

 The harder the exercise, the more you practice, the better you get at it. The hard work is worth it. 

5) If you could skip one item on today's to-do list, what would it be?

Well, today has 20 minutes left in it the I got much of the to-do list done. As for tomorrow's list, I'm always tempted to skip the gym, but this has to be done. Lots of me doesn't want to go out for lunch with the girls from my last job, but this too has to be done. I have a 21st tomorrow night - I will stick my head in the door for half an hour. 

 Tomorrow, I've just got to get on with it I fear. 

Today's song:

Movie Review: Sense and Sensibility

Movie Number 39 of 2026

The Movie: Sense and Sensibility

The Cinema: Hoyts Victoria Gardens

Runtime: 2 hours 11 minutes

Stars: 4

Oops, this is a bit late - but I've been going back over what I thought about this film, and in the words of Eleanor Dashwood, I greatly esteem it. 

Of course, this film is always going to be compared to Emma Thompson's 1995 version of the film, and I'm honest, Thompson's movie is a better film, however, this is not to take away anything this new version brings. They are different beasts. If anything, this new version is possibly more realistic, whereas the 

Today's Song: