I'm just back from a weekend of what feels like planes, trains and automobiles. I left Darwin early Saturday morning, landed in Sydney, took the train to a hotel, where I'd arranged an early check-in. Had a lovely 24 hours there, before catching the train to the airport, then back on a plane to Melbourne, before driving back home. It was a fun weekend.
I arrived back to a very happy cat. So happy that on lying on my bed, he joined me, sat on my chest, then purred until he dribbled in my mouth. Thanks, Lucifer.
Now for this week's questions, supplied, as always, by Sunday Stealing.
1. I wish someone would ...
maybe tell that Brits that the British Museum is almost completely filled with pilfered items and it really has no reason to be called The British Museum. A better name for it would be The Museum filled with Other Nation's Stuff. Or maybe they could give some of the stuff back. The Parthenon Marbles, anybody?
2. When I order Chinese food ...
I tend to go for old favourites. Living where I do, there's a plethora of Vietnamese restaurants which are excellent, but nothing beats an authentic Australian Chinese restaurant, complete with Honey Prawns, Sweet and Sour Pork, Lemon Chicken, Beef in Black Bean Sauce and Fried fried, with fried ice cream for dessert.
I still dream about something I had in a Chinese restaurant in Belsize Park years ago - Bang Bang Chicken. Poached chicken breast in a spicy peanut sauce.
3. I know it's not everyone's favorite activity, but I actually enjoy ...
Ironing. I'm doing it now between questions. I find it soothing.
4. A major pet peeve of mine is ...
the fact that I love to wear apple green. I have a few clothes that are this colour. And I also have the tendency to spill things on my magic shelf (boobs). I've never been that tidy an eater. Regardless, whenever I wear these apple green clothes, I always end up spilling things down my front, and it always stains like the Shroud of Turin. It's very annoying.
5. I remember when my grandfather ...
used to put me in the back of his car - a VW Bug named Hazel, and I used to sit in the boot. I thought this was the best thing ever. This was well before seatbelts and child seats were ever thought of.
6. I am not fazed at all by ...
travelling alone. I rather like it, if I'm honest, although it would be good to share things with people sometimes.
7. Long car rides ...
are something I love. I shove on an audiobook and hit the road. Being Australian, travelling long distances is in my blood. It's something we just do. I've been known to drive three hours to go to a party. You might sleep on the back seat and drive back the next day, but yeah, I love a good road trip. I love to drive too.
8. I don't understand the fuss over ...
Labubus. I don't get it. What is their purpose? They're ugly.
9. When I'm home alone ...
It's a normal night. I live with an obstreperous black cat.
The real question should be when there's somebody else in the house?... But I can't answer that, other than I might cook and I'd have to work out how to change the Neilsen settings on the box.
There is the concept if Territory Time up here in Darwin. It is not exclusive to Darwin, or the Northern Territory per se, but it is here.
Up here, time is a bit fluid.
It's been said that N.T. stands for "Not today. Not tomorrow. Not Tuesday. Not Thursday."
And it stands. Don't expect people to come back to you. It's not going to happen. You will get your information, your service, your car parts.... you name, when it happens.
It's just the way things are.
When it gets a bit fractious is when you're are using your Southern sensibilities and expecting something to run on time.
Which happened tonight.
I went to my normal nail salon at lunchtime to book a pedicure. I was polite. Asked if I could have a normal polish pedicure at 5 p.m. Of course it was. They took my booking.
I left work at five to five to walk around to the salon. Yes, I got way-layed for a few minutes by colleagues with various questions (the big one being did I want to come for a drink). I also had plans to meet a few team mates at 6.30 for a drink.
Fine. I got to the salon at five past five. Nothing too bad. I was asked to wait. That was fine. They gave me a bottle of water. Even better. (Dragon Nails are good like that, but then again, most nail salons will do this - it's how they roll up here).
I was shown to a chair at 5.20 p.m. By this time I'd struck up a conversation with a nice woman and we chatted on while getting massaged and she chose her shellac colour. Fine.
Remember, I got to the salon five minutes before her.
Then she got seen to first.
For me. Crickets.
Oh well, we kept chatting.
By five to six, I was wondering what was going on. I started to look uncomfortable. Speaking to the manager, who was wondering about, I said that I really had to get going at 6.20 - I might have to leave. Somehow, I had somebody come over to work on my feet.
It wasn't the long slow pedicure I've had there in the past - but I asked her to rush. They also did a good job.
And then it was over. I walked out at 620, ran home, dumped my bag and met the boys in the hotel foyer.
Not the relaxing lead up I wanted.
Never to mind. It happened; it was fine. Nothing to get stroppy about. My feet have been scraped and polished. No harm, no foul, just a touch annoying.
It's Territory Time. It's how things roll up here.
Unfortunately, the planes don't run on Territory Time. They run on normal people time, so I must get packed and get myself to the airport.
Today was a better day. The worst of the full moon was over, the computer was behaving, I got a lot done, I went for a lovely walk and ate healthy. What more do you want?
Well, Monty Python's Meaning of Life was on one of the Foxtel channels.
If I need something to top off a good day, well this is it.
I mean, how can you now laugh along with this?
Or this classic?
And then there's this...
And I still sing this...
I feel very blessed to have grown up in a time where this sort of silliness was mainstream and the thought police allowed us to be irreverent.
I feel very blessed that I can sing most of these songs by heart - normally after a few beers at the op of my lungs.
Every time I went to go into a meeting, of which I had five, my machine would freeze and I’d have to reboot, normally three or four times before I could get into the meeting.
I lost about three hours having to do this today.
Plus, it’s the end of the sprint. This means a whole heap of stupid admin..
Because it’s the full moon, my emotions are all over the place..
And it's not the day to do the pre-screening documents for the psychiatrist.
On the good side of things:
Tomorrow is another day.
Darwin in the dry season is gorgeous.
I did finish one piece of work, even if I had to do it three times over because I lost it every time I rebooted the computer.
And silent a book club was really good.
You have to take the good with the bad.
I’m now sitting here dictating this blog post into my phone whilst wearing a sheet mask. I call this a good use of time.
I’m doing it this way because it’s about all the energy I have.
Never mind, the full moon will be over by tomorrow.
Tonight's job was to introduce my colleague to the glories of the Deckchair Cinema. My colleague, new to the joys of Darwin, had to have the obligatory first session down there, and I love spreading the joy. It's one of my most favourite cinemas in Australia.
And my colleague is great company, so things worked out well.
We ambled down, got a bit of the sunset (which was nice, but not as spectacular as they can be) rolled up, grabbed some cushions, reserved our seats, grabbed some very nice dinner from the caterers and bought a beer, then sat down to enjoy this marvelous film.
This is a shortish documentary about a couple who have inherited the family pile in a Sussex community. The land has been over-farmed for centuries. The soil and environs had been plied with pesticides, fertilizers and all sorts of nasties which have been used in modern agricultural practices for the last hundred years.
On the recommendation of a tree expert, who came to look at their ailing oak tree, the idea was planted that there could be another way of doing things. They then went and looked at a re-wilding site in the Netherlands, where land had been turned over to nature, with incredible results.
Based on Isabella Tree's book, you watch as the couple let their estate be run by nature. Cattle, Exmoor ponies and pigs are introduced to the land. They are left to graze. They're not fed. They have to fend for themselves. And the land is left to do what it does.
It's nothing short of amazing.
What follows is an incredible view of what can happen when nature is left to do what it does best. Of course, they have their detractors - the local farmers thought they were mad. But after 15 years of a very hard fight, the land was regenerating - and the animals were thriving. (You can't help falling in love with the pigs and Duncan the Exmoor pony).
We live on this parochial island out in the south of the Pacific.
We’re a weird mob, or so said John O’Grady/Nino Culotta whose book did very well, which looked at our strange set of people. And we are strange. We have our traditions – think ham sandwiches on the beach at Christmas, or street cricket. We have our little oddities which make us charming including many of our well-known food stuffs. Vegemite and Fairy Bread anybody? And certainly not together. We sort of speak English, but our slang makes a lot of what we say uninterpretable to others.
Yes, we are a strange group.
Our Government does strange things too – like giving out honours on Australia Day and the Sovereign’s Birthday.
A little bit of digging and you find out that these honours have only been going for 50 years, the highest honour being that of the Companion of the Order of Australia – or AC. There’s also an AO (Officer of the Order of Australia), the AM (Member of the Order of Australia) and the OAM (Order of Australia Medals). I’m not sure how you get one of these, other than you tend to get nominated and it goes through some sort of panel, and you get your name in the paper. I have an aunt and uncle who have independently received an OAM for services to nursing and medicine. They were wonderful, community minded people. It’s a source of pride for the family.
But imagine my surprise this morning (okay, it was late last night, I found this out on the plane up to Darwin, thanks to Qantas wifi) to find out that bloody Scott Morrison was receiving the highest honour around. The AC.
What the actual…?
It’s a thing called optics.
According to The Age, it says:
Scott John MORRISON
For eminent service to the people and Parliament of Australia, particularly as Prime Minister, to notable contributions to global engagement, to leadership of the national COVID-19 response, to economic initiatives, and to national security enhancements, especially through leadership of Australia's contribution to AUKUS.
Let me dissect this. This is the bloke who pretty much handed over the COVID response to the State Premiers. The guy who didn’t order the vaccines. Who went on holiday as the country burned because he “Didn’t hold a hose.” This is the fellow who instigated Robodebt, killing and emotionally maiming thousands.
I put into ChatGPT the prompt “Tell me about Scott Morrison’s greatest stuff ups” and it came back with this:
Scott Morrison, former Prime Minister of Australia (2018–2022), had a number of controversies and missteps during his time in office that attracted public and media criticism. Here are some of the most notable ones:
1. Hawaii Holiday During Bushfires (2019)
What happened: Morrison took a family vacation to Hawaii during one of Australia’s worst bushfire seasons.
Why it was controversial: His absence was seen as tone-deaf and uncaring while large parts of the country were burning, lives were being lost, and emergency services were stretched thin.
Public reaction: Widespread backlash, with the phrase “I don’t hold a hose, mate” becoming symbolic of his perceived lack of leadership.
2. Vaccine Rollout Delays During COVID-19
What happened: Australia’s initial COVID-19 vaccine rollout was slow and poorly communicated.
Why it was controversial: Morrison said it was “not a race,” which many saw as dismissive while people waited for vaccines and lockdowns continued.
Impact: It hurt public confidence in the government’s handling of the pandemic and led to prolonged lockdowns in states like Victoria and New South Wales.
3. Secret Ministerial Appointments (2020–2021)
What happened: It was revealed post-tenure that Morrison had secretly sworn himself into multiple ministerial roles (including health, finance, and resources) without informing the public or even his own ministers.
Why it was controversial: Seen as an unprecedented breach of democratic norms and transparency.
Outcome: The Solicitor-General found it “undermined responsible government.” Parliament later passed legislation to prevent a repeat.
4. Handling of Sexual Assault Allegations in Parliament (2021)
What happened: Brittany Higgins alleged she was raped in a minister’s office in Parliament House.
Why it was controversial: The government’s response was widely viewed as inadequate and politically self-protective.
Public reaction: Sparked national protests and debates over the treatment of women in politics and workplace safety.
5. “That’s Not My Job” Leadership Style
Context: Morrison was frequently criticised for deflecting responsibility, famously using phrases like “It’s not my job” when asked about major issues (e.g., vaccine procurement, aged care failures).
Impact: Created a public image of being disengaged and unaccountable.
6. Sports Rorts & Pork-Barrelling Scandals
What happened: Government funds were allegedly allocated to marginal electorates in a politically motivated manner rather than based on merit.
Why it was controversial: Accusations of corruption and misuse of taxpayer money.
Auditor-General findings: Found clear bias in grant allocations.
7. Handling of French Submarine Deal Cancellation (2021)
What happened: Morrison scrapped a $90 billion submarine deal with France in favour of the AUKUS pact with the US and UK.
Why it was controversial: France was blindsided and furious, temporarily recalling its ambassador to Australia.
Diplomatic impact: Damaged Australia’s relationship with a key European partner.
I'm sure if I fed it a few more prompts it would have come up with a lot more.
Do you really want to give this guy a Sovereign’s Birthday honour? Seriously?
I mean, if he had any sort of honour about him, he’d not accept the award. The only Prime Minister to not accept to date has been Paul Keating, stating it was honour enough to be Australia’s Prime Minister. A truer man of honour.
The same can’t be said for Scott Morrison.
I think this lessens the impact of these Honours. Looking at the other AC recipents. Philip Adams, JM Coetszee, Baz Luhrmann and Catherine Martin. A lot of people who've done amazing work in community and scientific fields.
If I were them, I'd be seriously miffed that that fucknuckle from the Shire, Scotty from Marketing, had been bestowed with the same honour.
I'm not sure what the committee who hands out these awards were thinking. They're probably Liberal Party stooges, paid off, once again (like they were probably paid off when Tony Abbott brought back knighthood - another own goal).
