Anatomy of a Crap Evening

I need to get this down and out of me as I've had a crap afternoon and evening. Dot points will do.

On the good side of things, I'm fine. My knee is a bit sore and I'm shaken, but I'm otherwise fine.

I got mugged this afternoon. 4.30 this afternoon. I know this because I was going off to see Parasite and I needed to post a letter before the session.

I was nearing the post box in the car park. Some arsehole then drives up to me in a silver Honda drove up beside and grabbed my bag from over my shoulde from the car window. I grabbed on, but he accelerated and I had to let go.

I screamed down the place and gave chase. Another bloke, hearing the ruckus, also gave chase.

About 20 people came to my aid. It appears that I have a VERY loud scream.

Things could be so much worse. I could have got run over. I could have fallen and hit my head. He could have had some sort of weapon. I think I twisted my knee during all this - it's not bad - I'm sitting here with a bag of peas on it now.

Security arrived in minutes. It appears my screams were heard by the guys in the sporting goods shop and they came out to help. The bloke who gave chase came back. The car could not get out of the car park, so it was deserted on the top level. The silver Honda sedan was up there, filled with crap that looks like it was stolen - angle grinders, handbags, clothes etc etc. The car was deserted.

On the good side of things, having this happen in a car park in a busy shopping centre hopefully means there are CCTV recordings.

Police were called. The security guy at the centre was helpful-ish.

With no money, no phone, no keys, I went and saw a friend - there is a fellow who runs one of the stalls - we chat regularly and are becoming friends. He sat me down, gave me his mobile phone, got me a glass of water and some chocolate and let me get on with things like cancelling cards while waiting for the cops. He also loaned me $100 cash. He's an angel and I thank the universe that he was willing to help and so generous in his aid. Having his phone meant I could contact Jay, who came to my aid. She lives nearby, was home and was able to come help. (Facebook Messenger is brilliant for some things - this is one of those things)

Thankfully I have a replacement card sitting on the couch I can use and syphon money over to. Pleased about this.

The police called. We spoke as I took stock at what I'd lost:

• My favourite blue leather handbag
• My wallet  in which there was
• 3x credit cards
• Store cards 
• Drivers licence
• Medicare card
• Mobile phone (and iPhone X - about 2 years old and paid off)
• About $40 in cash and coins
• My blue ganesha key ring
• 1 ml of frankincense
• A stainless steel water bottle
• My keys (Keys to the car, flat, Freemason's temple, post office box, front gate and the front gate remote)
• A Nars lipstick in the colour of Fire Down Below
• Some used tissues
• My Myki Card
• My Opal Card (Sydney PT card)
• A charging cable
• A pot of Black Chicken deodorant
• Some other crap which I will think of at some stage - but this is by the by

Jay came pretty quickly. We swung by home. Roused the downstairs neighbours, Lea and Gene. The downstairs neighbours who have my keys are away but they have a house sitter. Texts were sent to ascertain the location of my spare keys (we feed each other's cats - spare keys are a necessity). Jay took me down to the cop shop where I gave a full statement. The constable I dealt with was excellent - I'd talked to her on the phone earlier. She'd had a bad day. Lots of dead bodies. A simple robbery with a person who wasn't screaming at her seems to have made her day.

Coming home, the neighbours had found my keys so I could get into the flat. I got my spare car key and Jay drove me back to the shopping centre to collect it. The car key battery was flat.

It's now 8 pm.

Thankfully the key / shoe repair guy was there. He replaced the battery and sold me a new gate opener (Jay providing the funds, which will be paid back shortly)

I went and bought some dinner and went home.

The land line in the flat was ringing. It was the police. My keys had been handed in  - minus my wonderful Sex+Death keyring. I'm utterly grateful for this but I'm still agitated that some arsehole has all my details. Thankfully most things are now locked down - just the medicare card and the driver's licence to deal with tomorrow morning.



But I'm grateful for a lot of things.

• For Jay being able to come and help
• For Craig at the shopping centre for being incredibly helpful and supportive
• For the nice people who came to my aid
• That I'm not hurt more than a jiggered knee and a bit of pride
• That my keys were turned in to the cops early and came back to me before the locksmith came (Still thinking I'll talk to the locksmith tomorrow about this)
• That for some reason I managed to keep my head through all this. 

Part of me wants to pop a sleeping pill now and go to bed, but I've had a G&T and that would not be a good idea (Stilnox and alcohol don't mix). What I would really like is to have a big, burly, clean, sweet smelling bloke to cuddle, but that is not available at the moment. I'll go see Maow Maow on Sunday.

Tomorrow I'll sort out the rest of stuff including getting a new mobile. I feel a bit lost without it. 

But it was a shit afternoon - with a lot of blessings. 

And to the arsehole who mugged me - may the fleas of a thousand camels nestle in his armpits and may a raging case of tertiary syphilis come his way.  Never fuck with a witch. Karma will get him. But messing with a witch means the bump back will be brutal. 

I'm going to try get some sleep now. Maybe tomorrow I will get to see Parasite....

Thanks for being supportive. 

Today's Song: (Cos it makes me happy)

The Rain Room

The Rain Room

Jackalope Pavilion, Corner of Fitzroy and Ackland Street, St Kilda

https://www.jackalopehotels.com/art/rainroom

Ticket Available until April - for all ages.

I love the rain. Maybe it's because I'm a country girl, maybe I'm just strange, but rain makes me happy. Okay, it's not so good when it's torrential and you're stuck without an umbrella and you need to be somewhere, but any other time, rain is awesome.

So when you tell me that there is a place you can go where you can walk in the rain and not get wet, I was going to happen.

According to the website, The Rain Room is:

"A 100 square metre field of continuous rainfall, Rain Room is a responsive environment engaging all the senses, allowing you to be fully immersed in the rain while simultaneously protected from it. A globally significant work, Rain Room seeks to explore how human relationships to each other and nature are increasingly mediated through technology."

In less wanky language, it's a room, where it rains and you can walk through the rain and not get wet. Sensors pick up where you are on the floor and it doesn't rain around you.It's very cool.

It is very, very cool.

Your ticket gets you 20 minutes in the Rain Room. When you turn up, your belongings stowed in lockers, you are taken into a vestibule. The guide gives you a bit of a talk - mainly they tell you to move slowly when you're in the space and to beware of people getting too close to you as you might get wet. They then take you into this darkened space, illuminated only by a single light at the end of the pavilion. And it's raining. Proper rain, not some passing shower. The rain you get in Bali. The rain we used to get when I was a kid. Rain that would keep you inside with a book and a cup of tea for an afternoon.

Walking into the installation, the rain parts around you. It's still raining around the place, but you are dry. It's all driven by motion detection sensors,which locate you on the grid which then stops it raining over you.

This left me with a huge smile on my face. It was sunny and in the late 20s when I entered the room. The temperature dropped ten degrees and it was happily damp. If you stand in the middle of the mat and close your eyes, you feel like you're in the middle of the weather. It's a joy to watch people find the boundaries of the  area keeping them dry. It's fun when you do get by the odd droplet. Moving too fast and you're guaranteed to get drenched - so it goes a bit against the grain - as most of us move faster when it starts to rain.

It was a strange experience. Worth every cent of the entry fee. There is something very raw about standing around in a dark room in the rain.

Then all too quickly it was over. A quick trip around the gift shop and then back out into the light and the heat. I was sad to leave.

I'd like to go back again and share the experience. Now that they are releasing more tickets, this may happen.


(Images are mine, from the phone)

Today's Song:

Film Review: 1917

Film: 1917
Film Number: 8
Stars: 4.5

"What passing bells for these who die as cattle?"
(Anthem for Doomed Youth, Wilfred Owen)

I've just come from seeing 1917. I've got a large gin and tonic in front of me and I'm struggling to find the words to describe this film, other than it is incredible. Incredible, visceral, unreal, haunting and a cinematic masterpiece.

The movie was widely tipped to win the Oscar for best film. I can see why that's is was the case - it won nearly every BAFTA and Golden Globe award out there. Sam Mendes' direction is flawless. He was nominated in the best director category. He didn't get it, but you can see why he was nominated.

1917 was nominated for ten Oscars. It won three - for Cinematography, Visual Effects and Sound Editing. It could have easily won in every section it was up for. Easily. This movie is stunning.

But this is not an easy movie to watch by any standards. It is a long poem of a film. This is the lovechild of a cinematographer with the poetry of Wilfred Owen. It exemplifies the horror, the pity and the utter pointlessness of war.

The premise of the movie is quite simple. April 6, 1917. Two corporals are asked to travel over No Man's Land to deliver a message to an isolated battalion to call off a pending battle. The movie follows them as they are subjected to horror after horror as they make their way to deliver the message.

Simple. Not so much.

I'll be honest. I was considering walking out of this film, not because it was bad, but because is was so intense. The long shot format is incredibly effective, taking you with the boys through their travels across No-Man's Land and into the French countryside and into the trenches. It's overpowering in places - a lot of places. I'm very glad I stayed, but I found it difficult - not the realistic depictions of war, but the constant feeling of suspense and dread. The score, which was also nominated for an Oscar is helps to build the drama.

My other thought, though this film is not about a real event, was based on numerous events which could have happened on in France in 1917. Having read my great-uncle's war records and being a bit of a War History nerd, you know that this film shows a lot of truth. And seeing this, you wonder why there was ever another war. It's just horrible what went on in World War One. The film pulls no punches.

This film also shows the politics of the army - something you would never wish to encounter in modern life. There are some fine cameos from some of England's best actors - Andrew Scott, Colin Firth, Benedict Cumberbatch, Daniel Mays and Richard Madden to name a few. But the film is stolen by George Mackay and Dean-Charles Chapman, who play the two corporals sent on this seemingly impossible task.

I'm glad I've seen this, but couldn't see it again. It was far too intense a film for my gentle nature.  As a piece of film making, however, it is extraordinary


Today's Song:

Fighting with Shirley

Today had me in the car for a lot of the day. First down to Frankston for lunch, then back to the city to see to lawyer to sign the will.

The latter part of the day was easy. The lawyer had everything drafted, it was just a matter of getting it signed and witnessed and that was that. Easy. A quick drive out to Hawthorn, albeit at the tail end of school traffic, but it was done and dusted in twenty minutes. I drove home. The car was filled with petrol at the bargain price of $1.22 a litre (It was $1.75 at some places today, so I feel this was a big win) and I came home.

But the drive out to Frankston was eventful in that I waged a pitch battle with Shirley.

Shirley is my car's GPS system. She's the second iteration of Shirley - I had another one that I could move from car to car, but this one has a Shirley built in.

The GPS was named after a friend's mother, a chain smoking, moderate drinking Lancastrian with flat vowels and a thousand kilometre stare which could cut through double glazing. Shirley was a teacher for most of her working life. She has permanent teacher voice.

Shirley is a good name for the car's GPS.

I checked the maps before I left the house. It's easy enough to get to Frankston from my place, but I don't know central Franger. Why would I? It's out of a 20 minute radius. I rarely go there. All I knew that it would be about an hour on the freeway.

Shirley had other ideas.

Shirley wanted me to take the Nepean Highway via Hoddle Street/ Punt Road.

Shirley was having a laugh. According to her, it would take me an hour and twenty that way.

My laptop said take the freeway, I'll be there in 55 minutes.

Her first directions had me heading towards Hoddle Street / Punt Road.

"At the end of the road, turn left onto Johnson Street."
"Piss off, Shirley."

I turn right onto Johnson Street and head towards the Monash.

"Recalculating route." You could hear the disappointment in her voice.

"Turn left onto Bridge Road."
"No, Shirley."

Shirley was having a laugh. As much as I dislike Burnley Street, it's a necessary evil, and out of peak hour, and besides roadworks, you can get through the Swan Street lights in one or two minutes.

"Recalculating route."

I'm sure the real Shirley would not be somebody you would cross if you were in her class. But I was happy to wing it.

"At the roundabout, take the third exit."
"Shirley, you're effing dreaming." I laughed as I made my way thorough the second exit and got onto the Monash. "I need to go to Franger, not Toorak you dozy cow."
"Recalculating route." If Shirley was human, you would swear that steam was coming out of her ears.

This went on all the way to Frankston. She tried to take me down every freeway turn off, to which I told her where to go, to which she responded with a cursory, "Recalculating route." She seemed to be getting more and more upset as the time to destination counter went down.

If I'd followed Shirley's advice, I would have been 20 minutes late for lunch.

Taking the freeway, against Shirley's best efforts to have me go another, longer route, I got there on time.

But Shirley's continual castigation let me ragged. Sometimes, just sometimes, I know better than Shirley. I feel like I have to answer her back - tell her off for being a stupid cow, ponder at her lack of judgement as she tries to get me to take Punt Road - but as most Melbournians can tell you, Punt Road should be avoided at all costs (A bit like the Dequetteville Terrace roundabout in Adelaide, or the Swindon roundabout and anything called Ring Road in England).

Bless her, she does get me places in the end, but I do doubt her judgement sometimes.

I'm just glad the real Shirley never ended up as my mother-in-law. If things had played out differently, it could have happened. The relationship could have been very difficult, especially if I had to tell her to fuck off with the monotonous regularity with which I must do with her namesake.

I never told the real Shirley's son that I named my GPS after his mother. I'd like to think he might see the funny side of it.

Today's Song:

Best Self Box: What do you get into arguments about?

I'm dipping into the box tonight as I'm still a bit knackered from the weekend and I really, really don't feel like writing. I need to acclimatise myself into more office-appropriate hours as I've been going to bed late, getting up late. As of next Monday, I'll be back at work so I think doing this gently is a good thing.

Can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm looking forward to going back to work. Okay, I need the money, but I'm looking forward to getting out of the house. I'm feeling a bit cabin sick.

Anyway, today's box question, What do I get into arguments about?

Well, living alone means I don't have anybody to argue with on a regular basis.

At work, I'm often the line of least resistance person or the one giving the orders so arguing isn't something that comes into it.

I argue politics with my family, toeing the left-wing, greener aspects of the argument. These can get pretty heated at times, but never do they get nasty. It is fun having polar opposite views compared to your family, who, for the most part, are what you could call just right of centre. But still, I argue politics with my family. I look on it as sport.

I also sit in the corner agreeing with the following topics:

• Vaccinations are necessary
• Climate Change is real
• Our democracy is being eroded away
• Spaying your pets is a good thing
• The Liberal/National Party are a mob of muppets
• Brexit is a terrible thing
• Gun control is a good thing
• Rabbits are either vermin or food
• Bananas are awful
• Keto diets are not good long term
• The Pixies are the best band in the world
• The Kardashians are a waste of space
• The ABC is a national treasure which needs to be funded better
• Cyclists are not all evil
• People who don't use indicators should be shot on sight
• There is little point to the works of Peter Carey and Kate Grenville
• Booker Prize winners are normally an awesome read
• The Oxford Comma should be used sparingly
• Karl Stefanovic is more watchable than Kochie (just)
• They should be doing more about the recycling in Australia
• Boycotting Murdoch entertainment / newspapers is a good thing
• South Australia is the best state in Australia
• Menopause does not have to be suffered through
• Water is a human right, not something to be bought and sold by the government...

There are lots of things I will argue about. It just doesn't happen that often.

I find myself in a bit of an echo chamber a lot of the time, but hey, it's the way things roll. 

Today's Song: (Heard in the gym tonight - it's awesome)

Thought Provoking Questions

I'm just back from Adelaide so I'm a bit tired. After a weekend of driving, showing some friends around, swimming at the best beach in the world and going to a big party this afternoon I'm actually more than tired - I'm exhausted. But I have an hour and a half to get my questions in. It's going to be a quick one.

So here we go.

Questions, as always, stolen by and provided by Bev at Sunday Stealing.


1. Is it more important to love or be loved?

To love. If you love, somehow, some way that love will be returned.

2. If you had the chance to go back in time and change one thing would you do it?

Ah yes, there is one thing. It was a night in about 1998. I don't want to go into details. I still wonder what might have happened is the events one one evening were different.

3. If a doctor gave you five years to live, what would you try to accomplish?

Write a couple of books. Lose some weight. Travel to all the places I really want to go to.

4. What is the difference between innocence and ignorance?

Ignorance is when you willfully disregard something which you should know, or have learned and you still disregard it. Innocence is when you've had no opportunity to know or learn something. It can be a very fine line.

5. What is the simplest truth you can express in words?

Trump is a dickhead. Can't get much simpler than that.

6. What gives your life meaning?

Friends, cats, food, books, writing, fun, swimming.

7. Can there be happiness without sadness?  Pleasure without pain?  Peace without war?

Yes and no. You need to see to not so good to really appreciate the good. It's a sliding scale. But you do need a little of each extremity to really appreciate the other. Pleasure and pain is a really interesting dichotomy as well. 

8. What’s the one thing you’d like others to remember about you at the end of your life?

That I was a good, kind, albeit quirky person - and a really good writer who wrote lots of books and all is good.

9. Is there such a thing as perfect?

No, but there is very good, great, grand, just right for the moment and enough. Perfect is a bad construct out of mathematics.

10. What do you love most about yourself?

My brain. My eyes. My ankles. That I will anything a go once.

11. Is it more important to do what you love or to love what you are doing?

Unfortunately there has to be a bit of give and take here too. Doing what you love is great - if you can get it. But if you love what you're doing it can make up for a lot of things.

12. What do you imagine yourself doing ten years from now?

Dream state?  As a successful novelist, I'd have a house with a back yard, writing books and living with my husband and our two cats and a dog. That would be grand.

13. What small act of kindness were you once shown that you will never forget?

Sounds a bit strange, but when my Dad died, I was alone in London. I had friends around, but no family. It was a hard time. A friend brought round some joints for me to smoke if I wanted to. She would come back in a week and take back anything I didn't take. I had one or two joints. It was a small thing in a very hard time. It meant a lot.

14. To what degree have you controlled the course your life has taken?

In the last few years, I've directed a lot of my live. Before that, not as much. I'm glad I've continuously kept educating myself and learning new skills.

15. If you looked into the heart of your enemy, what do you think you would find that is different from what is in your own heart?

Probably not, then again, I don't have enemies, real or perceived. Waste of energy.


Today's Song:

n

Travelled Out

Things to know about today:

• I have travelled to South Australia.
• I am travelling with six others
• As an introvert, this has its challenges, but I am amongst friends. 
• I'm forever rounding up these friends to get them moving. This is okay. 
• We had dinner at a Thai Restaurant in Victor Harbor, with my parents, some friends of theirs and my step sister. 
• There is a big party at my parents place tomorrow.
•  The Air BnB we are staying in is really lovely. Pity we're only here for one night.
• We went down to my favourite beach in the whole wide world before we came down here. 
• I'm going swimming at 7.30 tomorrow morning with a friend at my most favourite beach (this will entail a forty minute drive each way, oh well, it is the best beach in the world.
• My friends think I'm mad to be going swimming at 7.30 tomorrow morning.
• I am very privileged to come from such a place.
• But I could never live here again. 

Not much of a blog post. A bit too much travelling and a bit too much gin has addled my brain.


Today's song: