In an effort to do something a bit different and to shake off the hard week, I met Jonella and Thom for a Japanese dinner in Briiiighton before catching a film at the Briiiiighton cinema. We saw the Bond film. Yes I've seen it, but it was good enough to see twce. Meeting in Briiiiighton is great as it's about halfway between us.
Briiiiighton is a good place. If you like multi-million dollar homes, mansions, women with blonde tips and men in boat shoes without socks.
I haven't been to Briiiiighton in about ten years. I've been past it, but not to it. The last time I was there I was looking after my bosses dogs and and old colleagues cat in her mansion (husband was a surgeon - the cat was a passive agressive arsehole).
The Japanese place was awesome. Great food.
But the Briiiighton stereotypes were out in full force.
There were more septagenarian men wearing floral shirts than I have ever seen in my life. They all had one of two haircuts too - expensive short back and sides, or the overly long Beethoven look. And they left a trail of expensive aftershave.
The men around Richmond don't wear aftershave. Clean bloke is as good as it gets around here.
I saw more Teslas on the road there that there are around here - LOTS more Telsas. And small yappy dogs. And designer denim.
I know Melbourne is a diverse place, but after ten years of being away from the place, I wasn't prepared for the accuracy of the stereotype.
To shake off this sense of wonder, after visiting this Melbourne enclave, I have to go back to my roots. The Dead Kennedys will bring me back to reality pretty quickly.
It appears it's takeaway night for most of the inner East.
After a marathon chat session with the team after work after a killer week, and after probably on too many Blasphemy whiskys on top of some Baileys with some Mr Black coffee liqueur, I was getting hungry.
It was well after knock off time, but we kept chatting. My colleage smokes. I watched her over the camera, occasionally dropping a "I want a cigarette!" at her while being very thankful that she was many kilometres away.
The week pretty much demanded that we have more than one drink.
Anyway, it got to about seven. Hunger was beginning to bite. Unable to drive anywhere due to the amount of alcohol I'd imbibed, I ordered in.
A healthy burger from Grill'd and some sweet potato chips. They do great burgers and I have a standard order. I ordered dinner at 7.07 p.m. The app told me dinner should arrive at 7.40 pm.
Our drinkies meeting finished about 7.30. Jonella called. We had a chat. I went to sit out at the front gate to wait for my dinner. It was a good night for it.
7.40 pm came and went. I watched as the crows put themselves to bed.
7.50 pm came and went. Jonella and I kept chatting. The app said that my driver was on his way.
8.00 pm came and went. I said goodnight to Jonella and rang the dinner joint to ask where my dinner was - it appears there was no drivers to bring my dinner.
The girl on the phone told me of this. She said there were about 30 orders waiting for delivery. I was welcome to come and pick it up she said.
I thanked her for the offer, then told her I was too drunk to drive. This was a slight exaggeration. I wasn't drunk, but I wouldn't go behind the wheel of a car after the early evening session. If I was asking for a cigarette, I certainly had too much to drink.
So I waited for my dinner, contrilling the hangry feelings which were starting to bubble up.
Dinner arrived at 8.40 pm. An hour and a half later.
At least dinner turned up, but it was a learning experience. Avoid getting your takeaway delivered in the inner city on a Friday night. Maybe next time I'll walk down the local Vietnamese which is crawling distance from the front door.
But tomorrow is Friday and we down tools at 4 pm have a drink and look forward to the weekend.
Mind you, I'll have to put in a few hours of work as I'm getting nothing done at the moment - days are made up of meetings and trying to sort stuff out.
But I'm looking forward to some things this weekend.
Tomorrow night I might go to the gym. I'd see a film but there is nothing on at the local cinemas I want to soo (or they're on at the wrong time)
And I might settle into a movie on Netflix
There's meditation on Saturday morning
And the Patricia Picinini exhibtion on Saturday afternoon
And I've got a 3000 piece to get the the editor for Monday
And a writing block on Sunday afternoon
And I'll go round and see Blarney and Barney
And the normal house work, washing, ironing, food shopping
Just one more day to get through.
This is all I have in the tank tonight and I don't want to think about work and moan about it.
Another day of interviews. Me doing the interviewing, not being interviewed.
And another day of trying to explain to people what I actually do.
And another day of explaining just what makes up a technical writer.
The HR Rep was a smirking when I tried to explain to her that tech writers come in all sorts of forms, but we're cut from the same cloth.
Most of us can be considered quirky
Many of us will have have at least a toenail on the spectrum
Most of us are grammar and spelling Nazis
And we're all pretty nerdy in our own ways
And we're used to working on our own
A good number of us are older
And have had many jobs other than technical writing
Many of us also have the titles of business analyst, instructional designer, trainer or tester on our CVs
And most of us will have fallen into this job
And we're forced to be good at lots of things
And we can pick up things quickly
And nothing phases us
And nothing surprises us
And most of us have seen everything and expect it all to happen again
Tech writers are also used to being on the bottom of the food chain as we have to wait for everything to be done and tested, tried and settled before we can finish our documentation.
And our first reaction to anything is to say under your breath, "FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" before smiling nicely, nodding and assuring whoever is asking the impossible that will be done on time and under budget.
So speaking to a lot of technical writers over the last few weeks, you know the pukka ones from the ones who are just pretending.
Oh, and did I mention that we're not the most sociable of people. Misanthropes, introverts and grumpy bums. That's us.
But we can be personable, sociable and appear normal if we try. In interviews we really try.
Today was interesting as we interviewed somebody who displayed every last one of these character traits in an hour interview. Not the sociable, personable, can-do attitude bits.
We got out of the interview, closing off the call. The HR girl called me straight back.
"Well?" she asked.
"Umm. Yeah."
"Oh, my goodness."
"Umm. Yeah"
"You're not saying much."
"Umm, yeah. They're just saying everything I say in my head out loud. No filter. On the spectrum. Used to working on their own. They're probably very good at their job."
"I hear a but."
"But she's never fit in around here.We'd be too touchy-feely for them."
"You'd consider employing them?"
"Not for this job. No filter. Recipe for disaster around here."
"But..."
"They've been badly burned at their last job. I get it. I would have been the same if I was interviewing straight after a bad job."
"But..."
"We can't move them forward. They'd eat my manager alive. No point."
"But you're considering them?"
"Nope, but it is interesting for you to see what a real technical writer looks like."
"But you're so .... so bubbly... and good with people..."
One day, the HR girl will find out it is all an act.
Tonight at the gym, Cleo stuck on a Classic play list. Eighties rock. Early nineties rock. Bogan specialties.
Yeah.
It was awesome.
And as she pummelled me senseless, putting me through my paces, we saw each other's deepest, darkets knowledge of dodgy music, and just what you remember about these songs.
"Pand, who's this?" she asks as the first chords of songs came over the sound system.
"Jet."
"Baby Animals."
"Screaming Jets. Better. 1991."
"Pearl Jam."
Cleo perks up at the first bars of Alive, by Pearl Jam. I never got into Pearl Jam. I'd left for England when they got big over here, while I immersed myself in Brit Pop and the likes of Blur, Oasis, Pulp and Right Said Fred.
But Cleo gave me the dates of the Pearl Jam concerts she attended as a teenager. She still has the ticket stubs for the first concert. The second concert she never made - her father had died that afternoon. She remembers tossing up whether to go to the concert or not . (She didn't)
Then on came Beck. Loser. Cleo knew the words. It was cool
Then there was Paul Simon - that's more like it. You Can Call Me Al... well that got me through the leg presses and deadlifts, dancing all the way through. One of those songs I know all the words to.
"A man walks down the street
He says, "Why am I soft in the middle, now?
Why am I soft in the middle?
The rest of my life is so hard
I need a photo-opportunity
I want a shot at redemption
Don't want to end up a cartoon
In a cartoon graveyard"
I got told to stop dancing then. Anything to delay the 12 x 12 kilogram deadball slams.
Oh, and then the kicker.
Cold Chisel.
This is where my bogan roots come out.
I still maintain that singing the following lines at the top of your lungs while a tram going down Glenferrie Road drowns out your croaks is one of the greatest things ever
"Anytime you want to find me
I ain't got a telephone
I'm another world away
But I always feel at home, with my
Cheap wine and a three-day growth..."
(Most people would rather listen to two cats shagging that listen to me singing. )
Anyway, this is what made me happy today.
I started work at 8.00 am. I turned off my laptop at 6.00 pm. I barely left my desk.
But running around a personal training studio singing along to some tunes, shouting out the artists while pushing some weights. Oh, and I'm doing short runs again. This too is a great thing.
We all know mainstream media sucks. They pander to the right wing, they're painful, they only tell one side of the story if you don't read around (says she who dibs into The Age, The Guardian, The Shot and the New York Times on most days.)
Well, I think there are two things we should be talking about, even though nobody seems to be talking about them.
Firstly.
Petrol prices are up near $2.00 a litre.
Why isn't the media all over this? Sure, a house fire claiming the lives of four kids in Werribee - valid news. The captain of the Australian Cricket Team sending dick pics to somebody three years ago. Sure, very uncool and rather gross - valid news for a day. But the rest of it is around the lies of our Prime Moron (daily news, we should be used to it by now) and how the ABC is being investigated again and all sorts of other right wing clap trap.
But NOBODY is talking about the fact that petrol is now sitting at just under $2.00 a litre.
And I don't get it.
The other thing I think we ned to address is the following:
Jacqui Lambie laying into One Nation
If you haven't seen this, watch it. In full.
Love her or hate her, I think this speech may go down amongst the likes of Julia Gillard's misogyny speech.
I'm one who gives Lambie the benefit of the doubt. I don't agree with everything she says. And yes, she does occassionally sway to places I wish she wouldn't go.
But this speech is GOLD.
And she says pretty much everything I think about One Nation, and those dickheads people who are rightly or wrongly protesting vaccine mandates.
She pretty much says it all. She certainly mirrors my thoughts on a stupid bill, written by an idiotic party, for which five of the coalition crossed the floor to vote for... yeah, go figure.
Sure, she's a bit rough around the edges.
Sure, she sometimes makes the not so good call.
But in this case, the woman does good.
Like Ricky Muir before her, who ended up being a bloody good senator, Lambie has come into her own.
We need more like her to shutdown the right-wing, fear-mongering jackasses who are taking over country.
This time comes around every year, and every year I say the same thing - as an Australian, I really don't have much of a concept of Thanksgiving - it's an American thing We don't have it, unless you're lucky enough to have American friends who invite you round - hence I've been to one Thanksgiving dinner, held on the weekend after that blessed Thursday. Also, being on the last Thursday of November, I tend to be working, and the thought of eating strange foods, such as sweet potatoes with marshmallow (Which I discovered, strangely work together), pumpkin pie (which to an Australian is a bit of a travesty, as pumpkin is a savoury vegetable best left for soup and roasts) and roast turkey - which forever comes out dry if you're not careful, all the while battling your family. Yeah... I'll keep to working on the last Thursday of the month.
But I'll give these questions a go, supplied, as always, but Bev at Sunday Stealing.
1) What teacher are you most thankful for and why? What did you learn from him or her?
My high school French teacher was a wonder. She helped instill the wonder of other languages, and taught be how to learn languages. I'll forever be grateful for that.
2) What’s the season you’re most thankful for, and what’s your favorite part of each season?
I am thankful for Autumn (Fall) as the worst of the heat of Summer is over by then. I love everything about Autumn. Winter is my next favourite season as you get to cuddle up and eat heavy food and keep warm. Summer is good because you can wander around in the evening in the warm - I love eating outside on pleasant summer evenings. Spring is good because it's still cool overnight, but the days get brighter - and your washing can finally get dry on the line.
3) What electronic device are you most grateful for, and what does it add to your life?
That would have to be my phone. I think I'd be so cut off from the world without my phone. It gives me a lot of joy, my phone - I listen to music through it, stream television, keep up with the world. It would be strange not to have it.
4) What musician or type of music are you most thankful for?
I am forever indebted to David Byrne for introducing me to World Music. I love David Byrne - he's given me so much joy over the years. But then again, most music gives me joy.
5) What are you most grateful for that brings beauty to your daily life?
My cat. He's gorgeous. He's also a prick, but he's a wonderful, wonderful fellow. Literature and my friends also bring me a lot of joy and a sense of beauty.
6) What philanthropic cause or organization do you feel thankful for?
Both the Fred Hollows Foundation and the Catherine Hamlin Fistula Foundation. Both are very worthy charities, founded by Australians, that do amazing work around the world. I'm also grateful to the Leukaemia foundation, which was of assistance to my family a few years ago.
7) What foods are you most thankful for?
Ice cream. It fixes everything.
8) What local store or restaurant are you most grateful for? How does it contribute to your quality of life?
Oh, there are many, from my local coffee shops where I go every second morning - love Holla Cafe and Soul Origin at the local Shopping Centre. Of course the Vinh Ki , Roll'd and the Loi Loi my local Chinese / Vietnamese restaurants are great and feed me when I need feeding. The local Toscanos, the wonderful continental green grocer and deli are fantastic. We are very lucky when it comes to food over here.
9) What book are you most grateful for, and why?
This is a strange one, but that has to be Dr Spencer Johnson's Who Moved My Cheese. Reading this changed my whole live and set me living a different life from that day onwards. I continually remind myself:
It can change your life.
10) What act of kindness has made the greatest difference in your life?
My stepfather gave me the money for a ticket to England when I was 23. Another moment which completely changed my life for the better.
11) What challenging experience has ended up changing your life for the better?
There have been too many of them to mention. I find adversity is a great way to grow, whatever that may be. You have to breakdown to break through. Isn't that what they say?
12) What vacation are you most grateful for?
At the moment, any holiday would be appreciated. I'm very appreciative of the weekends I spend down the Great Ocean Road on retreat with other writers. These weekends away really do restore the batteries. Next year I intend to have four to six weeks off and go overseas. England is looking likely. We will see.
13) Name three days in your life that you feel especially grateful for.
Any day when I don't have to go to work
The day I moved to England
The day I worked out I could use my writing as a way to earn money.
14) What product do you use on a daily basis that you most appreciate?
Oh, that would be anything which is used in my morning ablutions. So this includes:
Good moisturiser
Clinique soap in extra mild
Some sort of serum - what ever is on special at the chemist
15) What, from this year, do you feel most grateful for?
I'm very grateful that I was able to get vaccinated and I'm very grateful that the lockdowns are over. Sure we have a few restrictions, but we can live freely now. Thank goodness.
