So I am writing this with the last wisps of a a slight champagne hangover. I say slight, as waking this morning I felt more like I'd had a good night and not enough sleep than too much lolly water. I'm also writing this with a feeling of absolute humility and hope.
Last night I attended the GLOBE Community Awards. The GLOBE Community Awards you ask? Yep, the awards celebrate achievement in Victoria’s gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and intersex community.
On Thursday night, I got a message from my mate, Dorian. Dorian was my study buddy at Uni. We try and see each other once a month and for the last five years he's volunteered his time to do the marketing, among other things, for the event. Somebody on his table had pulled out last minute and he wanted to know if I would like to come along. For the evening I would be Steve Standish. I think I make a very fetching Steve.
Well, why not I said. I had nothing doing last night.
Of course I asked the obvious questions. Dress code? (Frock up - what you wore to your birthday would be perfect) Umm, I will know only you, and you'll be busy. (My friends will love you, and you get to meet my husband, Jarrad. Besides, you can talk underwater with a mouth full of marbles) Umm, I'm a middle-aged, straight, white woman. (We're about diversity.) Food? (Gluten free, and there will be free booze.)
This was a no brainer, I was in. After listening to Dorian's tales of this event for years, I wanted to see it for myself - despite the fact that I hate crowds and being an inveterate INFJ, I feel far more comfortable sitting at home on the couch with a tub of ice cream. But there was free champagne, who was I to say no.
I'm also a longtime and passionate ally of the LGBTQI+ Community. Actually, I don't consider myself as an ally - I just like people for people for being people and I really don't give a toss about who they sleep with. Love is love. If you're nice, then you're my friend. It's not hard to care about people. I also have many gay friends and family. People I love dearly. Of course I'm going to support the community.
For me, I also feel a sort of solidarity with the community, just through my intimate knowledge of being "The Other".
Gloria and I were talking about this over breakfast today.
My friend Gloria is in her mid-sixties. She's been with her partner Gaynor for about 25 years. She was telling me that growing up in country Queensland in the sixties, it wasn't until she traveled to London when she was 21 that she discovered just who, and what she was - and that she wasn't some freak of nature. (Gloria and I also had a big discussion about what it is to be a witch - but that is another tale for another blog - or maybe not)
For me, having spent a lot of my childhood in plaster and calipers, being singled out for being the crippled kid, I get what it is to be made to feel different. Being pointed at, stared at, singled out, vilified, ignored and generally made to feel like crap for something you have no say over, yep, I get it. Now, as an adult, though there is absolutely nothing wrong with my legs now, I still have the lingering memories of how I was treated as a young child - and I know how I never want to be treated again. This has affected how I treat people now - which is with civility, kindness and compassion.
Anyway, I left work a little early, raced home, threw myself under the shower, applied some war paint, frocked up, climbed in a Uber and made my way to the Glasshouse on the banks of the Yarra.
So, what did I find at this event?
Well, other than a fabulous room full of fabulous people, I found myself among some of the most accepting, lovely, intelligent, fun and just all out wonderful people. (This is how I describe Dorian - so it was like being in a room with 500 people like him in spirit)
Dorian's friends and family were warm and welcoming. His husband's sister and her friends were over from Adelaide - and they were lovely. I had a fellow who was up for an award sitting next to me. PJ runs a wealth management company with a book worth over 50 million dollars. (Okay, years of working in finance and banking and means I can talk to this dude and not look like a muppet.) With a champagne under my belt, I relaxed into the evening, soon forgetting that I only knew one person in the room.
I was also struck by the calibre of the VIPs in the room. Senator Janet Rice, Fiona Patten, leader of the Reason Party, Farrah Tomazin - an Age journalist who I have a hell of a lot of time for - and Bert and Patti Newton - formaldehyde fueled Australian television legends.
For me, the best part of the night, well over the wonderful meal, the amazing atmosphere in the room and the lovely people was listening to the stories of resilience and hope that came from the crowd. Awards went to The Human Rights Law Centre, who took the government to court over the Same Sex Marriage Plebiscite, Project Rockit, a group who are a youth driven group against bullying. The Coming Back Out Ball hosted a ball for elders of the community members to celebrate. This is only a handful of the winners of the evening.
What really stood out was that I was surrounded by people who all, in their own way, are celebrating who they are, even if society has tried to make them feel like "The Other".
Chatting to PJ later in the night, he said,"You know, I'm 30. I've had it lucky. Sure, I've had my moments, but I've been lucky to feel supported. I'm gay know know. I'm lucky to have been born when I was. It's still hard, but it is getting a bit easier."
There is still a long way to go. The plonkers in the Federal Government who want keep it legal for religious schools to discriminate on the grounds of sexuality. There's the issues around toxic masculinity. There is the thousands of years of discrimination that can't we wiped away in a few years. However, as an outsider looking in, it feels like inroads are being made. And long may this continue.
I left at around 11 pm, about half a glass more champagne under my skin than was necessary, and with lots of people to say goodbye to, including the lovely PJ, who gave me his goody bag (and an excellent goody bag it was too - I owe him a coffee for this). My big take away. I left with a feeling that I'd just participated in something awesome.
A quick cab ride home made me realise why I tend to prefer taking Ubers (Ubers smell better, no cash changes hands, the drivers aren't as surly when you're talking a short trip and you don't feel bad sitting next to the driver in an Uber).
I've told Dorian that I'd love to come along next year, if he'll have me. He said I should bring Gloria and Gaynor along with me. I hope they can come along. I love celebrating with my friends.
Stunning, special night. Thanks again, Dorian.
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