I did a day in the office, had lunch with the engineer, had a session with the shrink then came home to an online meeting.
I'm stuffed and really don't want to be writing.
So here are a few notes from today.
1) Did you know you can buy a mouse at Officeworks for $139? This was the mouse that was recommended to me. Like yeah... nah. I had bought a very cheap mouse a few weeks ago after leaving my dongle on my other computer. Today, I went to use the very cheap mouse, to find it was no longer working. This meant a trip to the nearest Officeworks.
I did not buy the $139 bluetooth mouse. For that sort of money you'd hope it would make you a cup of tea in the morning. Instead, I bought a nice red one that will hopefully go fast. It does the job as long as the batteries hold out.
2) I've been fantasizing about the Qantas Club Bloody Mary's. They do good ones - it's all about the Maggie Beer Worcestershire Sauce. I don't have long to wait.
3) I'm starting to believe it's good to honour my quirks, whether they be neuro-spiciness or just some things just about me. I'm learning, with help from the shrink, that these oddities are okay. It's only taken 55 years...
4) My faith in human beings has been restored a little. I had a delivery today while I was at work. The courier was given instructions to leave the box behind my car in the carport. It seems my text wasn't received by the courier in time and they left the large box sitting outside the bottom of the stairwell for the world to trip over. They sent photos of this. Arriving home a couple of hours later, there was no box. I walked up the stairs thinking that I was going to have to complain. Thankfully, one of the neighbours brought the box and put it in front of my door. It's the little things.
That will do. I still have to ruminate over tonight's session with the shrink.
I don't really want to go into the office tomorrow. My cat gets a bit of separation anxiety, which will be made worse by him being taken over the Westgate Bridge on Sunday when I drop him off before heading to the airport.
There are better things for me to be doing. This includes:
Writing that novel.
Searching for accommodation in Britany and Normandy - which is proving to be much cheaper than what you pay in Paris, thank goodness.
I also have to do the Mason's books. Personally, I'd rather stick a pin in my eye, but I want this done before the weekend.
Oh, and I have to get my taxes ready.
But tomorrow, I'll go into work, go to lunch with my friend the engineer then go to the shrink afterwards.
I would just rather be working from home.
In the meantime, I'll get on with some of these jobs and sing along to the Uncanny X-men.
What happened to them? I just googled Brian Mannix - he still has a mullet...
I have been asked to describe the difference between Haas Avocados and Shepard Avocados. It appears in America they just have avocados and don't have to differentiate between avocado rockstar and pond scum ones that leave you feeling disappointed.
If I'm honest, there is nothing better than a Haas avocado.
This is a Haas avocado.
They are round, have dark green skins that go a purply colour the older the get and this is how you can tell and the flesh is soft and creamy. You crack them open just as they feel a little soft. They make the best guacamole. Haas avocados are the bomb.
This is a Shepard Avocado.
Shepard avocados are more long than round.
Shepard avocados appear to never get soft. If the do go soft then they are often brown inside.
Shepard avocados have firmer flesh - it's not as creamy. I also find the flesh more bitter than that of the Haas avocado. They also don't change colour when they are ready.
My mum doesn't mind using Shepard avocados in a tossed salad as it keeps its shape, rather than run in with the salad dressing. I don't like finding bits of this in the salad as crunchy avocado does not have a good mouth feel.
When in season, not being able to find Haas avocados in the supermarket is gutting.
Shepard avocados, in my opinion, aren't worth it. They're the red-headed stepchild of fruit.
If you're considering buying one because you can't find the superlative Haas ones, reconsider - use something else. Feta for example.
I'm sure there are people out there who will sing the praises of Shepard avocados. For me, they are just too much bother.
I was given this homework assignment from the shrink three weeks ago, and now, I'm after a lot of rumination, I'm ready to write out the assignment. Also, as I don't have access to a printer, nor can I read my own handwriting on a bad day, it's easier to put this out there online. I can show my shrink the link.
Simples.
The assignment - what is in my toolbox to help me dial down the anxiety.
This may seem like a strange assignment, but it's a necessary one.
So here we go.
1) The noise cancelling earplugs.
I'm triggered by noise. I know this. When I'm in noisy environments, be it Pump Class, or the office, or in a busy pub - whatever it may be, slip in these little life savers an have the noise dialed down by 20 dB. They work a treat and keep the anxiety at bay. I think I might have to get another pair of them so I can have them to hand. You need them on you to use them.
2) Where possible, go for a short walk / remove yourself from the cause of anxiety.
Getting away from what's ramping you up is never a bad thing. Once you're feeling the hackles rise, move away - and move. A walk is a great way to turn things around.
3) The hand-to-hand trick.
This is a good one for immediate dialing down. Get a ball, a wad of paper, something that fits in your hand. Pass the ball from hand to hand at the mid-point in front of your sternum. Move the ball out to your side, pass the ball to the other hand, and move it out to the other side. Do this for 30 or so seconds. Lok at your anxiety. Has it dialed down? Probably. Passing the ball from left to right and back makes your brain go from left-brain to right-brain and back again, putting you in a different place. Try it. it works.
4) Acknowledge what is going on
First way to treat a problem is to acknowledge it's there. Have a chat with the anxiety. Ask it why it is there. Work out what has triggered it. Is it rational? Is it reasonable? Can you do anything about it? A lot of the time, this will help dial things down.
5) Self-soothe
I have my ribbon - I'm not afraid to use it. Just having it my pocket can be of assistance. Some people have worry beads. I have a piece of satin ribbon to run through my fingers. It's a neurodiversity thing. Don't have to have a big deal made of it - it keeps my anxiety at bay.
6) Say no
You don't have to say yes to everything. If you're not feeling it - don't (And of course, sometimes you can't say no, but this is there at times when you can).
7) State your needs
Oh, this can be a hard one, but it's so good. Articulating what it is you need from other people. For me, this is particularly relevant for touch. Case in point. When I went for those breast scans a few months ago - the time where I stated that I needed to be touched firmly, letting me know in advance where they were touching me, as opposed to being grabbed and positioned by the radiographer - totally different experience. The former - I was fine. The latter left me triggered for hours.
Looking back over my life, it makes me look at my aversion to partner dancing, intimate touch, being ticklish, my hatred of crowds - you name it. There may be a reason I'm like this. I feel somewhat validated.
It's not just touch. I have to learn to voice my needs. After 55 years of suppressing this, it's going to be hard.
8) Affirmations
This is a privileged white woman manifesting thing, but I find they do work. Set the intention - watch it happen. I have a mantra for work, "It's going to be a good and productive day." Saying this a few times before work sets the intention - and it appears to work. "I'm made of teflon, no shit sticks to me" is another. "I am worthy." Set your intention and go for it. It works for getting things done.
For anxiety. "This too shall pass," and "I am safe," are good mantras.
There is a great power in words.
9) Breathe.
When in doubt, breathe, and count. It was in Ted Lasso. When your angry, count to ten before you do anything. Then check in on yourself. If you're still angry, do it again. Continue until the anger has died down. It works for anxiety too.
I'll probably think of a few more before I go see the shrink on Wednesday.
Today hasn't gone as expected. I was to drive out to somewhere near Bendigo to go to a session at the Goldfield's Gothic Festival. Instead, a large accident on the Westgate Freeway meant that there was no way I was going to get to this session - so after two hours in the car, I turned around, came back and I'm now doing my Sunday questions, eating a toasted bagel and patting the cat. These things happen.
Questions, as always, have been provided by Bev at Sunday Stealing.
1. What do you have hanging on your walls?
Framed pictures collected over the years. In the lounge I have a framed watercolour of Ely Cathedral, painted by a friend's father who was an well known Manchester artist. There's also three prints of his, another pen and ink drawing and a framed poster of the Sagrada Familia in Barcelona. I've also got a large, framed poster of Le Chat Noir. I think everybody has one of those.
2. Have you used an outrageous excuse to get out of jury duty?
I need to pay rent and keep food in my belly. Is that allowed? As a contractor, if I don't go to work, I don't pay rent - and jury duty does not pay that well. I might also pull the neuro-diverse card, see if that works - how can I be a peer if I don't think like the person on trial?
3. Where so you like to go shopping (not for groceries)
I love quirky little gift shops. Could spend days in those.
4. What was the last movie you saw in a movie theater?
I saw Barbie for a second time last weekend. I'm seeing Oppenheimer for a second time tonight. Both are great films, but in very different ways.
5. If you wrote a note and put it in a bottle to throw out to sea, what would the note say?
I have absolutely no idea. Besides, the ocean is a long way away from where I live (we don't count Port Philip Bay as the sea - it's a big bathtub.)
6. What decision have you made in your life that you regret?
I don't have regrets. There are a few things, looking back, I'd do differently, given half a chance, but that is not going to happen, so why dwell on it?
7. What is in your junk drawer?
Like everybody else, the third draw down in the kitchen has:
Batteries
Sticky tape (cellotape, scotch tape, what ever you want to call it)
Tea towels
Rubber bands
Bandaids (Plasters for you English)
Candles
Dried up tubes of super glue (Crazy glue)
Packets of chopsticks
Packets of zip lock bags
Thumb tacks
Blue tack
A roll of Alfoil (Aluminum foil)
A roll of Glad Wrap (Cling Film / Saran Wrap)
A roll of baking paper.
I love this song about the third drawer down. Never a truer word sung:
8. Have you ever gone to a high school reunion?
Yes. I went to my 30th high school reunion. We've all got old.
Or in the words of Marcella in Grosse Point Blanke:
9. Would you rather receive the GOOD news or the BAD news first?
Bad news first, always. Get it out of the way. The good news lets you get on with things.
10. What are your top 3 pet peeves?
People who are rude to service staff.
Drivers who do not know how to use an indicator.
Shepherd Avocados. I mean, just why?
11. Are there famous people from where you live?
I live in an inner city suburb and there are quite a few 'famous' people in the vicinity. The most famous and closest, if you are from Australia, is Molly Meldrum. he lives a stone throws away. Australian icon.
12. What kitchen gadgets do you use most?
One of the following:
The blender
The microwave
The jar opener - an amazing little plastic thing that pops air tight jar lids so they open smoothly.
13. Who was your elementary school best friend?
A girl named Pippa. This was back when I went to Primary School in the city. I have no idea what happened to her. I moved to the country, so that was that.
14. Choose an animal and tell us 4 things about that animal.
My cat, Lucifer is a black cat. I became his Mum just as COVID was bearing its teeth - best secondhand cat ever. He's five and a half years old. For a basic model black cat, he's hilarious. He's good on long car trips. He loves growling at the birds. When it's cold, he sleeps between my knees. I could go on and on about him. Love my cat.
15. What is your favorite pizza topping? What do you never want on a pizza?
My go to pizza is a Mexican Hot - hot salami, pepperoni, onions and chilli on red pizza sauce. I'm okay with most pizza. Love a good goat's cheese and fig. I'm fond of anchovies. I can go for a ham and pineapple pizza at times. My no-go zone would be chickpeas (garbanzo beans) on pizza - I have to be in the mood for those.
They do musicals about all sorts of things now. Come From Away was a 9-11 story. Fun Home was about life in a Funeral Home.
Bloom is about an old folk's home in an Australian city.
And it's wonderful.
The team from Working Dog have crafted this cracker of a show about the joys and pitfalls if living in a modern Australian old folk;s home. Penned by Tom Gleisner with music by Katie Weston, this musical is pitch perfect. It's funny. It's right on the mark and it thankfully doesn't fall into schmaltz.
As for the story, we first meet up with Rose (Evelyn Krape) who's found herself at the Pine Grove Aged Care home for respite - despite of the fact she does not want to enter the place and have her independence taken away.
At the same time, Finn (Slone Sudiro) answers an advertisment looking for somebody to live in the home rent free in lieu of some extra help around the home. Rose and Finn are met by Gloria (Christina O'Neil) and Ruby (Vidya Makan), the older nurse who's been there for years and the younger worker who's had her idealism shaken by the experience. They help the two new recruits to settle in among the other inmates - oops, residents.
The residents are a bit of a motley crew. There's Dough (Frankie J Holden), who's had a stroke and is there after the death of his wife. There's Lesley (Jackie Rees) the calm artist, poised and secure. Roland (John O'May) is an aging thespian who seems set on annoying Doug. And there's Betty (Maria Mercedes) the kleptomaniac who's waiting patiently for her son to arrive while racing around on her mobility scooter.
They are all under the thumb of Mrs MacIntyre (Anne Edmonds) the draconian manager of the home who is set on saving every penny she can. She is one of the highlights of the hour and 45 minutes of this show.
And yes, you know what is going to happen in this show, but that is okay. The songs are wonderful. Funny, sweet, tragic, hopeful. The dialogue is on point, right down to the swear jar references. You get a very good idea about the people in the home were before old age got them.
We have been prepping like a set of Irish maiden aunts before a christening, the excitement palpable.
"Has anybody got those IKEA battery operated candles?"
"I live down the road, I can get them now?"
"Where is this thing again?"
"What are you going to wear?"
"Does anybody have any CDs in their car? There's only a Frank Sinatra CD here."
I was driving. I wanted to ping back, "What's a CD?" The last CD I had in my car was a Skyhooks one. Not sure Jukebox in Siberia would be better than Ol' Blue Eyes crooning.
But back to the matter at hand. One of us had actually done it.
My friend Krissie has birthed a book. I'm sure if you asked her, bringing the book into the world was a harder undertaking than giving birth to her two perfect sons, who were sitting by the sidelines looking on proudly as their luminescent Mum took the stage.
But she's done it. She's written a freaking book.
I couldn't be more happy for my very clever friend.
It was a night. So many of the crew from the writing retreats were there. Walking in a little late thanks to Melbourne traffic, I was greeted with twinkling fairy lights, a lot of noise, and hugs. Lots of hugs.
The night was an utter success. Krissie was in her element. She said earlier in the week that she's be happy if only five people turned up. There was sixty or seventy in the place.
There was finger food. There was wine. Both necessary elements to any book launch. There were great speeches. There were more hugs. There was a notable security person who wandered the room, cleaning up and grazing on the food, their amazing height not allowing them to blend into the background while Sinatra sang softly in the background.
How can you have a bad night when My Funny Valentine blends in with the general chatter.
It was all wonderful, not just for the fantastic achievement, but for the quality people who gathered in this Elsternwick event space. There is something very special about being able to walk into a room, know half of the people there, where you don't have to explain yourself. Easy company. Happy company. People who want to celebrate you and celebrate you wins.
You don't get this very often.
I could not be prouder of my brilliant friend. I can't wait to read her book. (Which will be available on Amazon and other good book selling sites next week.)
And I can't wait to have my own book and my own book launch party, even though I'm an introvert who hates being the centre of attention.
Tonight has helped re-light the fire to get this done.
