Movie Review: Death on the Nile

Movie Number 8 of 2022. (Technically it's Number 9 because I saw Belfast again)

Movie: Death on the Nile

The Cinema: Hoyts Victoria Gardens

Stars: 3

The Kenneth Branagh festival continues with his next foray into Agatha Christie-land with his big budget production of Death on the Nile. 

Is it as good as Belfast? Hells no - but Belfast might win a few Oscars. This wont be doing that, although the costumes were spectacular.

Is it as good as Murder on the Orient Express? No. It's far more vacuous than that. 

Is it watchable? Absolutely. 

This is a Branagh movie, complete with the Patrick Doyle music and the 65 mm film stock. And it is BEAUTIFUL to look at. 

The crux of the story, ten people end up on a boat on the Nile for a wedding party. 

The party includes: 

• the bride (Gal Gadot)
• the groom (Armie Hammer)
• the maid (Rose Leslie)
• the jilted lover (Emma Mackey)
• the lawyer (Ali Fazal)
• the doctor (Russell Brand)
• the singer (Sophie Okenedo)
• And her manager/daughter (Letitica Wright)
• And her boyfriend and Poirot's mate (Tom Bateman)
• Oh, and French and Saunders and a set of closeted lovers. 

And of course, Kenneth Branagh as Poirot, that stuffy, sweet-obsessed, OCD-suffering Belgian. 

We get a bit of back story about why Poirot has his moustache. Then the movie gets into the action. 

Somebody ends up murdered on this big boat on the River Nile. Who did it? Everybody has a motive. Everybody has a reason for wanting this person deat. 

By the end of the film, five of the passengers have been placed in the boat's freezer waiting to be carted off and buried. 

Look, it's based on the Agatha Christie novel. It's going to be a bit silly.

But this is very pretty to look at even if the script lacks in places. Yes, it's a bit hammy, but it's Agatha Christie. Branagh brings some weight to Poirot, the unlucky in love, but too smart by half detective. 

The rest of the film is just fluff. 

As I said earlier, it may not be the best film in the world, but it is very pretty to look at. And that is saying something.

Today's song: