Sunday Stealing: Family

I am with my tribe.

I am with my tribe down the Great Ocean Road this morning. In some ways, these people, who I have either never met, or only see a handful of times a year are my family. They are definitely my tribe. Good women (and men, but they are few and far between here) Bolshie, loud, big-hearted, fun, outspoken women. It's wonderful. 

Being the early riser, I was up to watch the sunrise. The ritual Bathing of the Lunatics, where a number of us run into the Southern Ocean buck naked will be occuring soon. 

It has once again been a phenomenal weekend. 

Sunrise, Seacroft, Apollo Bay

The Bathing of the Lunatics

I don't talk much about my family, but I will give it a go. Questions, as always, provided by Bev at Sunday Stealing. 

1. How big is your immediate family? Who are the members?

Immediate family consists of my mum, step-dad, and two sisters. One biological sister and one step-sister. My sister has a husband and I have two nieces, one here, one passed. My step-sister has a partner. This is the family unit. 

2. Who are you closest to in your family? What kind of relationship do you have with that person? Is it like friendship?

I am not terribly close to my family. We all get on. We all love each other, but wear aren't close. They live interstate, which doesn't help matters. I like that we're not in each other's pockets.

Of my Melbourne family, Blarney and Jonella are the ones I'm closest too. Blarney is a sister. Jonella a very good friend. 

3. Which day of the year are you most likely to spend with your family?

In the past it would be the second Sunday in February. Until COVID, mum used to have a big party on the front lawn. I used to go home for that, normally with a few friends in tow. 

4. As a child, did you go on family trips? What do you remember about those vacations?

As a family unit (Mum, dad, sister and me) went on the odd long car trip to faraway places. I remember being bored in the car and fighting with my sister. Isn't that what you do on long car trips?

5. Is there a black sheep in your family? What is different about them?

That would probably be me. I'm not a real black sheep - I just moved away, got an education, I'm big time into the Arts, never married, don't like property, don't have kids and generally go against my family's middle class bent and minor conservative traits. Ah well. 

6. Do you know your extended family? How many of them have you met?

I have 15 cousins. I've met all of them. Some of them I'm in semi-regular contact with - they visit me in Melbourne, I'll visit them in the far off places in which they live. They're nice people. Even the gun-toting, Trump supporting Christians are nice people - we just don't agree on some stuff, but that's people in general. 

7. Have you ever been to a family reunion? How was it?

We had a get together for my Aunt's 90th birthday with quite a few of the clan. My cousins and I sat around talking about the strength of our oestrogen patches and the fact that the women in our family have a hideous time during menopause. It was wonderful to see them all, in a group, with their adult kids. Their kids, now young adults, are nice people too. 

8. Who are you most proud of among your relatives? Who do you look up to?

I'm proud of all my cousins and family in their own way. I look up to the ones who have overcome great adversity. They are pretty amazing. My sister lost a child. I have absolutely no idea how she is still standing. But she is. 

9 What characteristics have you inherited from your parents? Do you look like them? Do you behave like they do?

I am a strange mix of mum and dad. I have dad's hair, and mum's eyes, hands and ankles. I'm what happens when you mix a wombat with a racehorse - round body, long legs. I got Mum's ability to rhyme and dad's ability to talk to anybody. But that's about it. I'm my own woman. 

10. Does your family have any heirlooms? Will you inherit anything that has been in the family a long time?

Not really and no. I have mum's original engagement ring, and dad's box brownie camera and 21st tankard. We're not a heirloom sort of family. 

11. What happens to old people in your family? Do they live with younger family members or move to a retirement home? How would you prefer to spend your old age?

The old people in my family tend to live happily in retirement homes until they shed this mortal coil. In the past, when it comes time to go, they don't tend to suffer. Unfortunately, my favourite aunt, aged 94, is in the process of departing. It is hard to hear about. It must be even worse for her. There is some good in passing without suffering. I will miss her terribly, but I wish her a peaceful passing. She's in Canberra. We reckon she's holding on to see everybody, but the state borders are still shut between South Australia and the ACT. It's hard. 

12. If you are married, how well do you get along with your in-laws?

I'm not married. I've never been married. I like to think I'm not that silly. 

13. What do people mean when they say, “you can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family”?

Family are the people who will be there regardless - even if they don't like you that much. I don't think I would ever, volunarily choose my family for my family. They would probably say the same of me.  Your friends are your chosen family. They're good. And they, and you, can choose to stick around. 

14. If you live far away from some members of your family, how do you keep in touch? How often do you communicate?

My family are about 500 miles (800 kilometres) back in Adelaide. My Mum and I talk once a week on the phone. I'll probably give her a ring when I'm driving home today. I can go months without speaking my sisters, but we keep up with each other on Facebook. 

15. Are you so close to any of your friends that you consider them to be like family?

Yes. Blarney and Barney are definitely family. I put down Blarney as my next of kin when required. I've sprung her from hospital on a number of occasions - she can return the favour. Jonella is family too. Just is. 

Today's song: