Don't look for hippopotamuses

CW: Girly gynae stuff.

 A night on the couch sorted the most of this stuff out. 

My head is around it now, but it's taken a few days to come to terms with what's going on, more on a cellular level than anything else.

Every two years I head off to have a pelvic ultrasound to ensure my ovaries haven't turned against me. There's ovarian cancer in the family - it's a precaution.  Just before Easter, a text came from my doctor to call her about the test results (with a big NO CANCER in the message - which is a good thing). We had that chat last week and the scan showed up some irregularities in my uterine lining. She was referring me back to my wonderful gynaecologist to see what she was going to do. 

I saw her yesterday. 

I will say now, I love my gynaecologist. She's an awesome woman, a little older than me, sensible, very funny and straight down the line. Having the same bits, she understands what's going on downstairs. When you have somebody with instruments up your bits, it's nice to think the person handling them is treating you like they'd like to be treated. We also have a tendency to talk about gin, cats and books. A good woman. 

After talking to my doctor, and Jay, herself a GP, we were all of the opinion that I was going to go in for a good clean out (also known as a D&C) at worst. At best, the gynae would come back and say that there was nothing to worry about. 

I was a little late for the appointment. I called ahead, seeing I was having a daft day, didn't check where her rooms were, and in the last three years, she's moved from one street in East Melbourne to another. Regardless, five minutes late I got in there and walked straight in. 

"I wasn't hoping to see you for another 18 months."

"Well, you're a curious case. I'm not sure what's going on. I wanted to call up the imaging people and give them a serve, but they seem to think that your uterine lining is not doing what it's supposed to."

"And you have to show duty of care."

"Yep."

"Have you had any strange things happening."

"Occasional very minor spotting. That's it. I've told the GP about it."

"Okay."

Anyway, push comes to shove, I have to go in, get a D&C, have my Mirena coil replaced and let her have a good look around about what's going down there. It should be nothing. If it isn't, they've caught it early and I'll be staring down the joys of a hysterectomy - but as I have been saying, just because you hear hoof beats, don't expect zebras. Or elephants. Or hippopotamuses. 

Surgery is booked for the Sixth of May. It's day surgery. I'll be out later that afternoon, probably have the next day off due to having your insides poked and prodded and will be fine by Saturday. 

And we're hoping this will be the end of it. 

But yesterday's conversation has left my brain full. Full of all sorts of things I'd prefer not to be thinking about. 

My first thought. The last time I had this done (about three years ago) because I had nobody to stay with me over night and I spent the night in hospital. Which was fine. It's why you have private health insurance and when it's just for stupid observation, you're gone by 9 a.m. and in an Uber by 9.10. Same goes now, but with the addition of what to do with the cat. I'm sure he'll be fine with the neighbours feeding him overnight, but still...Or I get Barney to come over and pick me up (and the cat, maybe) stay there the night. Or find a friend to come stay over. When it comes to doctors orders I tend to comply. 

Next on the list is the what ifs. What if it is more than just some silly imaging anomaly?.On the good side of things, the Mirena is updated for another five years and things go back to normal. But what if its more? The thought of a hysterectomy, though they tend to do them via the keyhole now, doesn't thrill me. But then again, in the scheme of things, for me it's now a redundant organ, it's never going to provide the world with children, so I don't need it. But again, don't look for the hippopotamuses. 

Then there's the blood tests which I need to have done in the next couple of days. No drama here, except for the inclusion of the STD tests just to rule out everything. Again, I'm not worried about this (though if I've been given chlamydia I'll be very, very pissed) and the chances of this are next to zero, but it still plays on your mind. Having the same partner for the last ten years, it's not a call I'd want to make, especially as we're not in contact any more. 

It's times like this that I half wish I wasn't alone. Just having somebody here to pick me up from hospital without feeling like you're imposing on somebody, having somebody here in the house at night (other than the cat) without feeling pathetic that you have to ask somebody to stay with you. The not having the thought of even wondering about a positive STD test (though I really do believe this one is a non-issue, but it's good to know when I find another relationship, that you're totally in the clear). 

Still. I'm over the worst of the overthinking. 

I just have remember to listen for the hoof beats and not expect hippopotamuses. 

And get on with it. 

Old people logic

I'm not in a place to write tonight. All is fine, but I'm processing a few things. An early night in bed with the cat is needed. It's nothing bad, just have to get my head straight., 

But today's rather cool thing today was talking to my Mum. 

It was a normal Mum conversation. I had some things to tell her, which I did. 

Then she tells me about her book group - how nobody had read the book - Stephen Fry's "Moab is my Washpot." I had a think about this. I've had that book sitting on my bookshelf for 25 years. It was given to my by a friend. I've never read it. I'm intrigued now. 

But then she said she'd talked to my Aunt. She appeared to be in good spirits. Sounded better than she did a few weeks ago. 

The only thing she was miffed about was Prince Philip. Not that he had died - she didn't begrudge him that, good innings and all. She was more miffed as the fact they cut the show Vera to make way for the news. 

My mother said she felt exactly the same. 

I told this to my workmate, who had a good 18 years on me. He too was annoyed that Vera was cut short. "It was just getting good and then the news came through. They could have waited until it was over."

I just thought this was cute. 

Now I'm going to go back to processing today. It's all fine. Some things need a day. 

Unlike Vera, who needs to be consumed when she's on the ABC. It seems old people get pissed off when she's interrupted. 

Today's song:

Magic Biscuits

Never underestimate the power of home baking. 

Never. 

There is more power in a batch of biscuits that you can comprehend.

The handwritten recipes, handed down, dug up, shared, 

Are testament to their power. 

For baking makes memories solidify. 

From licking the bowl and beaters at your grandmother's side,

Or your first tentative efforts at making a cake for your dad for his birthday,

Or putting aside a bad relationship with the healing properties of butter, sugar, eggs and flour. 

We have known this for centuries. 

For baking is a simple act of devotion.

From the simple steps of melting, stirring, sifting and kneading. 

Each stroke of the spoon, each added ingredient,

Puts in a little more love. 

There's also the constant evaluating.

A little bit more whipping. Add more sugar. Take away some mixture. 

It's the constant, reevaluating to make things perfectly imperfect,

For there is no perfect in baking. Just good enough, with love. 

This love transfers from person to person, through the anticipation, and the eating. 

It is one of life's simple rituals. 

I made two batches of biscuits over the weekend. 

The first for Barney's Dad, who turned 80 last week. The biscuits were wrapped up in cellaphane and handed over, with a kiss on the cheek and instructions no to share them with the kids. He was under orderss to take a couple home with him to give to Edna - his wife. Edna and I have the occasional bake off. I still think I've improved her lemon slice with the substitution of Nice biscuts for Marie biscuits.

I did a bigger batch so a couple of these bad boys could be dropped into the downstairs neighbours and a couple went to the Soap Guy, because I know he loves them. 

They were appreciated (My downstairs neighbours love when I bake - they often get the spoils.)

The second batch was made on Sunday night for a friend. Something told me they'd be appreciated. 

I ran them over to her at lunchtime. Baking can't fix things, but it can add a bit of sunshine on a rainy day.

Looking at the process, the effort - on my end, it's nothing. A few dollars for some basic ingredients. 20 minutes to make up the batch, the worst of it being the creaming of the butter and sugar - oh, and the rolling the dough balls. Then about 15 minutes in the oven. Another ten minutes for the icing, all the while ensuring you don't put in too much almond essence in the mix. 

And an hour round trip to drop them off. 

In the scheme of things, on my end, it's next to no effort.

But there is a power in the kindness of baking.

It must never be forgotten. 

Today's Song:

Morning Meme

It's my last day of holiday (vacation) and part of me wants another week but the other part is happy to be going back to work on Monday. I've not got half of what I wanted to done, but it's been a good break. And the Mason's books are done, so this is an acheivement. 

Regardless, on with questions as I need to get baking. 

Questions, as always, come from Bev at Sunday Stealing. 

1. You have just been hired to clean your own home, what is your first complaint?

I've never had a cleaner, but I can hear them moaning about the dusting and the floors. I hate both jobs with a passion. Now I have floorboards down, I'm a bit better with the floors. Still, I hate dusting. 

2. Are you able to ignore a ringing telephone?

Yes. I ignore the landline around here all the time - however, I do check the number coming through on the mobile and will see if I answer or let it go through to voicemail. I'm getting better at ignoring it as it sets off my fitbit. A quick glance and you can see who it is. 

3. How often do you allow a ringing phone to go to voice mail?

Regularly. See above. 

4. Do you answer your cell phone, out in public, every time it rings? Or do you silence it and get back to it when you’re in a more private area?

My phone is on silent/vibrate all the time. I will occasionally answer if I deem the call necessary, or text the person back saying call you soon. Mum has a habit of calling while I'm at the gym - that goes through to voicemail regularly. If I'm out, unless it's obviously urgent (or work during office hours) I'll leave it, or take it outside. I also try not to talk to people when I'm on public transport. I hate that so those calls remain quick. 

5. How often would you say you’re on your home phone? Your cell phone?

One of this week's jobs is to get rid of my landline. It never gets used. Pointless having it.The only people who call me on it are telemarketers. I'm on the mobile 2-3 time a day for calls. 

6. Do you like talking on the phone or do you view it as a necessary communication tool?

I'm a texter and emailer, but you need the phone. It is a necessary communication toold. There are only a few people I sit and talk on the phone to. Also, I use WhatsApp, Teams, Zoom and Facebook Messenger a lot for communication tools.

7. When did you last go for a bike ride?

Many many years ago when I was in a triathlon. That was like eight or nine years ago. I'm on a stationary bike regularly at the gym, but that doesn't count. 

8. Do you own a bike?

No. 

9. Given the most popular New Year’s resolution of losing weight, would you consider putting bicycle riding as one of your exercise options? Why or why not?

Would I ride a bike - no. You need a helmet over here and I don't have one. Also, I'm challenged by balance at the best of times. You can't fall off runners, you can bikes. I'm also scared of the driver around here. I'm not a fan of bike riding, though I can ride a bike. 

10. If you had to name a smell that always makes you nostalgic, what would it be? What sorts of memories does the smell evoke?

Old Spice and Juicy Fruit chewing gum reminds me of my father. 

11. What did you do over the weekend? No detail is too small. This is your journal, so tell us about the mundane tasks in your life.

It's been a big weekend. On Friday night I was out at the Myer Music Bowl seeing an aboriginal group called Spinifex Gum, who were excellent. Yesterday, I was down the Mornington Peninsula at a Gin High Tea. And today, I'm baking biscuits to give to Barney's Dad who's over from Tasmania and he turned 80 last week. It's his birthday party this afternoon at Blarney and Barney's place. I've blogged about Friday night and yesterday. See links. 

12. If it weren’t for my blog, I’d _________.

Probably be further into my novel. And nobody would know what I'm up to. 

13. When was the last time you replied “because I said so”? Do you find yourself saying that a lot? Or do you prefer to tell people WHY you want them to do something for you.

I don't think I've ever said that - probably because I don't have kids. I tend to tell people why I want them to do something - you have more chance of them doing it. It's an old trainer habit. 

14. What is the worst gift you’ve ever received?

Oh, that would be an unwanted sex toy. I've received them a couple of times and really didn't appreciate them. The thing about sex toys, they're a personal thing. A bit too personal to be given as a gift outside of a hens (batchelorette) party or from an intimate partner. 

Oh, and I remember receiving this dreadful bottle green sweater with koalas on it from workmates when I was leaving for England. It was dire. I exchanged it for a plain black t-shirt with Adelaide embroidered on it in black thread. Much more my thing. 'Spose it's the thought that counts. 

15.  Tell us the worst gift you’ve ever given. What was the reaction of the recipient?  

Oh, that would be a garden gnome for my friend Mariah. That was funny. The look on her face was priceless. Her father used to use it as something to aim for as he backed out of the driveway. 

Today's song:

Gin High Tea

Jonella and I have had this planned for months.  The festival of Norty's 50th birthday continued today. Norty had her birthday in January, but with COVID, we had to postpone this celebration. And then there was finding a suitable date, waiting for a booking. And finally the day came. 

GIN HIGH TEA at the Flinders Hotel down the Mornington Peninsula. Wooohooooo. 

A gin high tea combines two of my favourite things. High Tea - and gin. 

I rocked up at Jonella and Thom's place at 10.30. Norty came soon after. We piled into Thom's car and he drove us down to Flinders, about an hour down the way on the Mornington Peninsula. Thom was our designated driver, as the thought of a high tea, two gin and tonics and a gin cocktail an hour out of town meant somebody had to drive. It fell to Thom. I'm normally the driver, but Thom's good like that. He's also a big man and big men tend to process alcohol better than women. 

We made it down to Flinders with ample time for the midday start. 

Well, what can I say? As birthday presents go, I wish somebody would give me something like this. It's awesome.

We were seated quickly, after doing the cursory COVID check in. The attentive staff gave us the menu, which gave us the choice of gin, the gin cocktails and the menu. 

Photo credit: Jonella 

First up, a gin and tonic to start the day off well. The High Tea offers a good selection of local gins, including the yummy Original Gin Company flavoured gins and offerings from Bass and Flinders, Drops of Jupiter, Rocky Jones, Four Pillars and the Ink Gin Co. 

Me, I started with and Ink Gin with elderflower tonic. I've had a bottle of Ink Gin in the cupboard for a while. It was a lovely, soft start to the day. Ink Gin is blue in the bottle. Add tonic and it comes out pink. And everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, is made very good with the inclusion of elderflower tonic. 

Jonella, Thom and Norty made their choices from the Original Gin Company gins - they way I saw it, may a well try those gins I don't drink regularly. This was a good, and bold move. Besides, Ink Gin is known as the Instagram gin...

Then the food came. 

Oh my. 

It was a wonderful spread.

We started with the pork, veal and fennel sausage rolls, with a homemade tomato sauce. Okay, they could have been a bit warmer, but they were very tasty. 

Next, chicken, zucchini and comte tart. A lovely and deceptively light tart - just a mouthful and just enough. 

I went for the finger sandwiches next. There were two sorts.  Prawn and Cucumber, and Chicken and Pistou. I love high tea sandwiches with their crusts removed and their fresh, fresh bread. These were mighty tasty. I was also reminded of how much I miss England and their prawn sandwiches which can be found at any Boots Chemist or supermarket. 

My favourite savoury was the smoked salmon blini with salmon roe and soft herbs. This was delightful, but smoked salmon is one of my most favourite things ever. 

We lingered over lunch. Heading into the sweet things, another drink was ordered. For me, I went for the Sloe Gin Smash, a mix of Original Sloe Gin (YUM), and Rhubarb and Ginger Gin, mixed with Elderflower Jam and Soda. It was delightful. 

Then there were the scones. Scones done right. Bottomless scones, both plain and pumpkin scones. Scones with raspberry and rhubarb jam and whipped cream. I have Cornish blood. Scones done right are the best - they appeal to my English Cream Tea roots. These were fantastic. Crisp on the outside, fluffy on the inside. Mum couldn't have made better. 

But I was filling up. It was a struggle to finish the food - but I am up to such challenges as I'm part Labrador as well. 

Dessert was divine. 

I started off with the chocolate mousse with pistachio cream. I'm not a chocolate lover, but this was just enough in its small glass. Any more would have been too much. Thom loved his. You can't take a man away from his chocolate mousse as you can see.

Then there was the passionfruit creme choux, with cream cheese and orange marmalade. I loved this. It wasn't too sweet and the flavours were complex as they were subtle. Then again, I love passionfruit, so what's not to love. 

The best bit of the day was the rose, raspberry and lychee macaron. Oh my... there are not words, other than I was very, very happy to have ended the food on this. 

And then the last gin and tonic for the road. For me, I chose the Rocky Jones pink gin, which was not what I was expecting when it came out. It reminded me of a dryer Poor Tom or Archie Rose, not a raspberry tainted affair I was expecting. It cleansed the palate and did the trick. 

A good walk around Flinders, a stop at a couple of galleries was necessary. The other three stopped at the chocolate shop. I was fooded out, so stood outside - not able to stomach the thought of any more food. The smells made me feel a bit wretched. After this, we piled back into the car for the hour drive back to Jonella's place, after a quick stop at the beach. Being wet and blowing a gale, we didn't stay long. On a nicer day, we'd have walked down to the end of the pier. 

By the time we got back, the worst of the alcohol had been processed and I was good to drive. 

And now I'm home, having a cup of miso soup for dinner and a couple of anti-spasmodics have been taken to stave off a gall bladder attack.

But it's been a most wonderful day. 

Today's song: 

Spinifex Gum

The Act: Spinifex Gum

Where: The Myer Music Bowl

There are all sorts of things going through my head at the moment. I've just been to see LIVE MUSIC! Prince Philip has shaken this mortal coil. I was out on a Friday night. And I've been to see LIVE MUSIC. I'm more excited about the live music, knowing how lucky I am to be living here in Australia where we can do such things. 

Let's unpack this. I received a call from my friend earlier in the week. She had a spare ticket to see this group playing at the Myer Music Bowl. Would I like to come along. I'm known to go to the opening of an envelope, and with the night free, I said why not. My friend is big into aboriginal and indiginous culture and issues, and as a fledgling ally, I though it a good thing to go to. Besides, at $25 for the ticket, the offer was too good to refuse.

We met in front of the Art Gallery and wandered up to the bowl. I think the last band I saw there was Mumford and Sons in January 2019. Things have changed a lot since COVID. The outside venue lends itself well for live music. Instead of the normal free for all on the lawn with eskies and picnic blankets, they now have these pods which have up to six people in these built up pods, in which there are six chairs and a small table which attaches to the railings. You're free to dance, sing and enjoy the concert in your pod. In some ways it's better thanit used to be as you bum doesn't go numb sitting on the ground. 

We got there early. My friend, another friend of my mate, her daughter and two of her grandkids, aged seven and four. The kids provided some entertainment as we waited for the warm up act. 

And then it started. The first act had a traditional welcome to country first up. I've grown to love the welcome to country most acts will have now, especially when they are done by local elders. This one was moving. Seeing the line up was made up of indiginous acts, it made sense to do more than te cursory aknowledgements. 

Then Allara Briggs Patterson came on. A woman, some tech and her double base. Glorious, haunting music. She made the audience sing along too. 

She was joined by Lauren Sheree joined her for a duet, which was also excellent. Then a brother on the didgeridoo joined them. I love the didgeridoo - it cuts me to the quick. It always has. After this, the Djirri Djirri dancers came on and performed a couple of dancers. 

What I loved about this first set was the stories they told. The song lines are amazing, heart felt, honest and brave. 

After a short intermission, the main act came on. 

Spinifex Gum are a choral group from Far North Queenland, consisting of indiginous girls. They met up with some of the founding members of the Cat Empire.

It's easier to provide the blurb from the Arts Centre. 

"A compelling performance celebrating the passion and talent of our Indigenous youth with Spinifex Gum – a show-stopping collaboration of voice, sound, movement and change featuring Marliya Choir, an ensemble of Aboriginal and Torres Strait teenage singers, together with Emma Donovan, The Cat Empire’s Felix Riebl and special guest artists.

Part protest, part celebration, Spinifex Gum is a uniquely modern Australian song cycle. It has the power to disarm, inspire, and speak to us in a way that no individual voice can. This work addresses pervasive issues from the social disparity present in the Pilbara to deaths in custody, disproportionate incarceration, land rights and more. Marliya Choir – who sing in English and Yindjibarndi – bring a vibrant young voice to the Australian issues in Spinifex Gum through their compelling blend of harmony and protest, while trailblazing a new pop-choir genre."

They were awesome. Loud, proud, professional, their harmonies were spot on and their message on point. The song about Lang Hancock was laced with anger. They sang about the waterways. The song about Miss Dhu, a woman who died in police custody was stirring. 

The evening was  thoroughly enjoyable - thought provoking, eye-opening and very, very present. These young women are fantastic. 

What inspires me is that these young women have the courage (and talent) to sing about things when others can't say it. They are a fantastic mouthpiece for indiginous issues. 

But along with the gorgeous music and the on-point messaging, what struck me was how wonderful it was to see live music again. Just to be outside on a cool night at the Music Bowl with other people. It's something I've missed. 

Then, walking back to catch the tram home, it was so good to see that the streets were fairly busy. Okay, it's not back to pre-COVID levels, but there were people out and about - coming and going from Comedy Festival show, meeting friends for drinks. The buskers were back playing down Swanston Street. There were more than a handful of people on the 109 tram home. 

It's nice to feel just a bit normal again. 

Today's song:

Eating and Drinking Day

There is a small cat next to me demanding treats. It seems I cannot go out for a couple of meals without being told off  and treats must be given after. 

So I left this morning at 7.15, walking down to Three Bags Full in Abbotsford. to meet a mate for breakfast. It was a strange, foggy morning, and I often forget how much the light is different at this time of day. 

Victoria Street, 7.15 am

It's always wonderful catching up with Damo. He lets me live vicariously though his burgeouning PhD, I get to talk about being a cat-owning wannabee novelist. 

Breakfast this morning was the Three Bags Full tasting plate. Orange juice, a poached egg, home cured bacon on sourdough toast with some smashed avocado and feta, with some bircher muesli, Greek yoghurt and grated apple. The perfect blend of savoury and sweet - and not too much (Three Bags Full are generous with their servings). This was washed down with my standard almond decaf latte. 

I waddled home two hours later and got stuck into a day of admin.

This evening, after a chat to my doctor, a leg wax and finding out that getting rid of my landline might just take a trip into town to see Telstra, I went to Brogan's Way to meet Ginny, a friend who had the night off from Mum duties. 

Entering the premises, it looked like my kind of place. 

We settled in and had a pre-dinner coctail. I settled on the Ginprirhina - this passionfruity affair with passionfruit gin liqueur, passionfruit pulp and all sorts of other goodies in it. It was divine. Then again, I adore passionfruit - it's my favourite of all fruits. 

And I think I might have to go back to get some of their passionfruit gin liqueur. I know I'm not supposed to be buying gin until July, but I think I can get this on a technicality - as it's liqueur...

The off to dinner at The National, as The Royston was booked out. 

I had the parma, because I'm boring and thankfully it's not a huge parma - just a nice sized one. 

And to drink - a Hendrick's Midsummer Solstice Gin, with soda and lime. It was just perfect - soft and refeshing - but maybe should have left out the lime and gone with the cucumber (which you always have with the garden variety Hendricks)

We are so very fortunate we can do all of this, even if it is a COVID normal state. It's so good to be able to go out and meet friends for breakfast, lunch and dinner. 

In all, it's been a really good day. 

And then it was home to this goober, who greeted me with cuddles. 

Today's song: