The Angst of the Middle-Aged Man

 After getting off the red-eye to Sydney this morning, arriving at my hotel, begging my way into an early check in (thank goodness for a platinum status with the hotel group, thanks to all the trips to Darwin), and a quick shower, I met up with an old friend for breakfast.

We've known each other for a while. 

We're both middle-aged/

We talked about lots of things. 

Trump - we both loathe. 

His PhD candidature - interesting topic. 

Working in the Territory - love it though the travel is a bit brutal. 

The joys of middle-age. Men settle. Women don't. Women fight against disappearing. Men don't. Women expand. Men contract. 

Then the topic meandered onto his sixteen-year-old daughter. 

I should say, I've been having variations on this conversation over the last few months with various friends. 

"How's Meg?" I asked. 

"Hmph."

"I have a cat for a reason. Far easier than children." Well, it's a fair point. 

"But kids don't shit in your shoes."

"True."

"So, what's the problem?"

"She has a boyfriend." I could hear the despair in his voice. 

I will say, from what I've been told, Meg is a lovely, sensible girl, who has nice friends and does her homework, and stays out of trouble. She occasionally gets a bit lippy, but what sixteen-year-old doesn't bite back a bit? Sixteen is awful. If you don't mind spending time in their company and don't want to shoot them, you've done a good job of parenting them. Well that's my uniformed reasoning. 

"So, is he nice?" I asked.

"He has a mullet." The disapproval was evident. 

"So, what's up really? Your little girl has a boyfriend. She's growing up. You don't like him?"

"HE HAS A MULLET! My daughter has a boyfriend who has a mullet!"

Oh boy.

"But didn't you have a dodgy haircut when you were a teenager? A Flock of Seagulls flop? A James Spader combover. Or did your Mum still cut your hair?"

I shouldn't have goaded. He changed the subject after that. His bottom lip was still quivering. 

Just to remind you. 

Haircuts of the 80s.

And okay, when James Spader had hair in the 80s, it wasn't too bad. He's knicked a lot of his sister's hair mousse. 

Then there's the Mum cuts. 

He was unconsolable. Couldn't tell me if he was okay. His defining negative feature was that the bloke had a mullet. 

Middle-aged men. They're such snowflakes. 

Today's song:

Warm Rain

 Is there anything better than tropical rain? I think not. 

It is the end of the wet season up here and for the last few days, it's been raining, heavily at very inconvenient times. You want to go for a walk? It rains. Want to go for a swim. It rains, with lightning and thunder. Yeah, not a good idea. You wake up. It's raining. 

I rather like it. 

Today, after work, after handing in various passes and turning off the computer, I went to make a trip to the bottle shop to pick up some gin. 

Of course, it was raining. 

But not the heavy tropical rain. It was like a Melbourne rain. But warm. 

And as I wanted to get to the bottle shop before returning home, I decided to walk in the rain. It wasn't heavy enough to do too much damage to the Birkenstocks, but heavy enough to get me a little damp. 

Warm rain. Almost cloying rain. It felt like I was wandering through my morning shower. That warm. 

It was just lovely, 

And now I'm packing to go home. Sort of. 

And overnight flight. A day and a night in Sydney. A morning flight (but not too early) on Sunday morning. Get back, get unpacked. Collect the cat. 

And that's the weekend. 

I've got two hours left here this trip. 

It's still raining, though a little bit heavier. 

I still like it. 

Today's song: 

Winnings

 We ate our winnings this evening. Three months ago, the three of us won a $150 voucher for the dinner at Sweethearts, a pub/bar/club on Mitchell Street which is a bit more upmarket than the normal backpackers places that line the streets. A pub crawl down Mitchell Street normally includes stops at The Darwin Hotel, Shenanigans, The Tap and Monsoons - Sweethearts is a bit further down the road and I'm not sure the bouncers would let you in. All of the pubs in Darwin have bouncers. 

Anyway, the three of us and a ring in, Chunky, who's in his last weeks at the company, came along too as a proxy leaving do. We put the voucher to good use. It fed the three of us very well (Steaks all around) and a few non-alcoholic drinks, because we're being a bit boring. But it was a lovely night. 

As was normally the case we tried to get an ice cream at Johnn Johnn's, but they were closed (and it was only just gone eight), so a trip to the seven-eleven was needed. 

We were home by 8.30. 

My other winnings occurred just after work. A proper swim was taken, restoring my soul. 

The problem with work travel is you have to fit in exercise as and where you can. Yesterday it was tipping down. I also had the Silent Book Group at The Last Supper - something I like to do when I'm up here. And walking was out because it was too rainy. And there was no way I was getting in the pool, because of the storms. So no exercise was had. I've missed exercise this trip. Today, just the required 20 lengths before dinner was just what the doctor ordered. 

I mean free grub and a swim. How much better can a night get?

Today's song:

Tonight I read

 Tonight I read, because it is raining.

I read at a silent reading group of Cavanaugh Street, I read this morning when I woke up at about 630.

And I’ve been writing all day, so I don’t really feel like writing now.

I will say, I do believe I need a writing group. I don’t think I’ve had a writing groups since I did the Faber course in 2020. One of the good things about Faber is you have a writing group there for you For a whole year, there to critique your work. 

You don’t need to be friends, although you may end up friends at the end. You also need to be with people who write at the level you’re writing it. You also want people who can provide constructive criticism. You don’t want somebody who’s just gonna sit there and say that’s nice…

But I have no idea where to find a right group. I just know I’d like one.

Today's song:

The Apartment

 Walking in the door, things feel different. It’s not as I left it four hours ago when I came home for lunch. The towels have been replaced in the bathroom. The bed has been made, well made better than I had made it this morning, the sheets folded with military precision, the blanket tucked in neatly. The dishes that have been sitting on the sink I’ve been done, again not many, just a coffee mug and a couple of spoons, but now they rest on top of a tea towel, drying. 

For the first 18 months of coming up to Darwin for work, I stayed at this hotel. We’re always given a one bedroom apartment, meaning we have our own bathroom and kitchenette. But with the cheap room rate that has been negotiated, it also meant that the rooms would only be serviced if you stayed longer in a week.

The other small perk of the job is that you can join the hotels loyalty program. You get points for every night you stay.

There are also tiers to this loyalty program. Stay 30 nights over the year, you reach gold, and you get a drink on arrival and better rooms.

Stay more than 50 nights and you reach platinum. It appears with this you get complementary room servicing on a daily basis. 

And it also seems a bit strange to me, because I don’t mind using a towel for a couple of days in a row. But it is rather nice to have somebody make your bed and do your dishes.

Oh, and the song of the day has been stuck in my head all day. I have been dancing to it. For all the great things about having your room serviced on a daily basis, there is nothing that beats a good earworm.

Today's song: 

Random Bogans and other observations

After a very bumpy flight up to Darwin, I’ve been left a little bit wrecked today. I’ve got a bit of work done but not as much as I would’ve liked to. It’s hard when you’re really tired. Nothing that an early night won’t fix.

Anyway, here are some random observations from around Darwin today.

1) Chatty Cathy Award

I was sitting next to a colleague today with a plaque on his desk which read, ‘Chatty Cathy Award 2023.’ My colleague could easily talk underwater with a mouthful of marbles. They make me look like an amateur. I have never seen a better corporate award in my life.

2) Random Bogans

I like bogans. There is a simple honesty about them. Proper bogans, that is, not cashed up bogans. And I met some delightful ones in the pool tonight. I am known for talking to anybody in the swimming pool, and the two women I met this evening were refreshing. They came from somewhere outside of Albury/Wodonga. They were covered in tattoos. They were about my age and up in Darwin to watch a football match played by on of their sons.

And as much as I am somebody who likes the finer things in life, I can talk football and beer and Darwin and thongs with the best of them. Okay so I would never drink VB by choice. I like to think I have a little bit more class than that. But was actually refreshing to talk to these two women. 

My colleagues joined me in the pool 10 minutes after we started talking. It was remarked that I will talk to absolutely anybody. Yeah, I know. And that's okay. 

3) Iced VoVo Hot Cross buns.

What is it with these Frankenstein hot cross buns? Hot Cross buns should have currents and a little bit of spice and a white cross on top - and if you're my friend Bernie, you hunt out the ones with mixed peel - which is a bit of a polarising ingredient. I went into Coles tonight after work to get my supplies for the week and there on sale were not only iced VoVo hot cross buns, But Vegemite hot cross buns, caramilk hot cross buns, And Apple and spice hot cross buns.,,,, Sheesh!

I’m sorry, why do we need all of these flavours of hot Cross buns particularly as Easter is still a month away? It’s a little bit criminal. It used to be the case that you would get these wonderful tasty treats in the week before Easter and that was it. If you came from a really strict family, you only used to get them on Easter Sunday.

I’m not sure I agree with all of this.

Regardless, my curiosity got the best of me and I have a pack of four Iced VoVo hot cross buns in the fridge. I just wish they had a mixed pack of all the specialty ones so you didn’t have to buy the pack of four that way you could them all out as a single serve.

I'm curious and judgemental all at once. Sorry for paraphrasing Walt Whitman (and Ted Lasso). 

4) Handling the Locals

Knuckey Street after dark can get a little hairy. We know about this, and as a rule of thumb, unless you're with others, be back home by 8 pm. I was walking home from doing my weekly shop at 7 pm. I wanted to be home for MAFS. With the brewing storms about the place, it felt dark out. There were few people around, which is a bit standard for the tail end of the Wet Season on a Monday night. 

My groceries in hand, I made my way back. 

I was greeted by a local outside of McDonalds. 

"Hello there," was the greeting. 

"Hello," I replied in my smiliest voice. 

I didn't really want to engage, but isn't it easier to offer a moment of recognition before moving on? It seemed to work, as there was nothing more to the exchange that the greeting. I crossed over Smith Street, they stayed eating their chips. 

It was a much more pleasant encounter that the next encounter with some pissed idiots I met at the next crossing who were walking three abreast, and very slowly, on the footpath. 

What is that adage about wanting to smack slow walking dickheads who walk slowly in front of you. 

Regardless, I made it back for MAFS, groceries, dignity and clean criminal record intact. 

Today's song: 

Today's song:

Darwin Bound

• Bags are packed.
• Floors washed
• Cat deposited with friends who will treat him like their own. 
• Book is in bag. That needs to be read by Tuesday evening. Four hours on a plane will hopefully make that happen. 
• Knitting in suitcase.
• Kitty litter tray cleaned out.
• Phone is charged. 
• Jewelry changed
• Darwin work pass changed from my Myki,
• Power points are turned off.
• Plants are watered (and neighbour has been asked to give them some water mid week.)

I think all I need to do now is change my clothes and get on my way. 

My Darwin bag is waiting for me up

What fun. 

Today's song: