Thursday, June 11, 2020

Dear Cat

Dear Cat,

I am trying to do some work. I know I sit at this computer a lot of the day, but really, seriously mate, I can't spend most of my morning playing stick and ribbons with you. I know you like to jump about. I love that you love to jump like a basketball player, leaping after the ribbons. I love that you cart your stick and ribbons around the flat. but presenting it at my feet for me to pick up and play, sorry mate - later.

Just as sitting next to me clawing my thigh is not going to let me do your bidding. The answer to your  pleadings and ministrations are as follows:

  • You have been fed this morning.
  • I've sorted out your whakaparu (Blarney calls it a shitter. I also call it a poo box)
  • I can only scratch you behind the ears for a few seconds.
  • Spearing my thigh with your claws will get you nowhere
  • Walking on my keyboards will not mean you get to talk to my workmates
  • Sitting on the windowsill next to me is preferable to spearing me with your claws
  • And if you've eaten all of your pussy flowers (kibble) you can wait a bit. I don't want you getting too chonky
I will say that I'm rather enamourned with how you snuggle under the blanket on he bed. I love how you leave a warm spot for me at night. I like how you sleep behind me knees - that you snuggle in during the night using my calves for a pillow. 

And I especially love how every now and then, you jump up into my lap, then crawl up on my shoulder, snuggle in and start to purr. You don't stay long, but I love these little cuddles. 

Okay, I love you dearly, my lovely second-hand small panther.

Even if my thighs are ripped to shreds and you're a bloody pain when I'm on the phones. 

Lots of love,

P (Your adopted Mum)

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